That Blonde Haired Boy

Chapter 33

Charlie's POV

I got myself cleaned up like Niall said and went and sat in bed and cried. I miss my dad. Miss my mother..my brother. Now I miss phoebe! Why does everything have to happen to me.

I promised myself I'd never harm again, but when it's like this that's all I ever think about.

Niall doesn't know that I used to self harm, and I'm scared what he'll do if I told him I used too. I've been clean for years now.

His anger really scares me sometimes, I had bad anger, but then I had therapy and I calmed down a lot. I remember the last time I got angry, and when I see Niall angry it just makes me sad at how I used to be like that. If only I was a vampire.

Niall came in the room and looked stressed out, he flopped onto the bed next to me with his 'i want to cuddle' face on.

"You okay now beautiful?"

"I guess so..."

"Good, I know it's a hard day but your doing pretty well!" He smiled showing his teeth.

"Thank you Niall"

"I'm gonna go back to Zayn" he sighed. "Do you know when Harry's gonna be back?"

"Have no clue, probably when the receptions finished."

Niall walked out of the room. As soon as he left I felt my eyes watering, the tears dripping down my face. I rushed into the bathroom looking for something sharp that could damage my skin, i didn't care anymore, I needed to do it! This was my only way out of anger stress and sadness. The only key.

I found a razor and broke it with a pair of scissors.

I looked in the mirror to see my hair messed up and my mascara running down my face. Looking at all my insecurities straight in the eye. My horrible fat body and my ugly face that only makeup makes it beautiful.

I took the blade and carved it into my skin, the pain was horrible. But I felt so relieved. Blood poured out of the slit while the tears ran down my face. The cut was deep. But all my pain was gone.

The blood went down the sink and I threw the dirty blade away, I grabbed a tissue and put it on my wrist and went and sat in bed and cried more. I never thought I'd be able to do that again, ever.

**

I fell asleep and woke up to Nialls snoring in my ear, what even was the time? He was cuddling me so tight i couldn't move to check my phone.

"Stop moving" he mumbled.

"Sorry" I kissed his hands.

He woke up after that and started to stroke my hair, it felt so good.

He started to stroke my arms, tickling them and then gently stroking my hands, I turned my wrist over so he wouldn't see my cuts and scars.

He stopped stroking my hand.

His body went stiff.

I kept my eyes tightly shut as I was scared what his face was gonna be like.

"Charlie... What are these?" he pointed at my scars.

I started crying heavily into the pillow, Niall sat up, still staring at my wrists.

"Niall I'm so sorry please don't hate me! I got bullied when I was younger and it was the only way out!"

"I'm not angry at you...it just hurts me to see you harming yourself."

"I've been clean for like four years, until earlier.."

"What did you do earlier?!" His voice went deep.

"I cut"

"Charlie!" He shouted. His temper scared me more than anything.

"Niall I'm sorry.."

He pinned me to the head of the bed and cuddled me, grabbing both of my wrists feeling the scars with his fingers.

"I kiss the scars on your skin" he kissed at my wrists. "I still think you're beautiful"

_____________________________________________________

This chapter was hard for me to write

But I hope you guys understand self harm and depression

Il make the next chapters happier okay!

And do you guys ship larry stylinson?

Bromance or romance?

I'm thinking of adding some Larry into the story as well

Following as many people as i can

Vote and comment

Ly