Consumed II [DISCONTINUED] (boyxboy)

1.) Numb {Prologue}

A/N: This is the second book in the Consumed series. Read book #1 before you start this one!!!

Enjoy!

Numb.

That's the only way to describe how I feel.

Sure, there's probably some fancy psychiatric term to describe the type of pain and emptiness that I'm feeling right now.

But, the only one I can come up with right now is numb.

Numb to the fact that the world is basically over.

Numb to the fact that most of my family and friends are all dead.

Numb to the fact that no matter how badly I want to, I can't go back in time to stop certain events from taking place.

Numb to the fact that Jacob is...

No.

If I don't say it, then it's not true. It didn't really happen.

None of it actually happened.

I never met Jacob in the first place.

He never came into my house that night when they shipped me off to Cherry Hill.

We never laid together in the back of his truck and watched the starts twinkle in the sky in Greenwood.

He never kissed me and stole my breath away right before he saved my brother.

We never made love to each other.

And he never said 'I love you.'

That's what I have to tell myself to get myself together.

That's what I have to tell myself to keep myself alive.

I can't go moping around filling my head with what if's. What's happened has happened and there's nothing that I can do to change the past. I can only look towards the future, no matter how depressing or scary it is.

I tell myself this as I stare up at the beige ceiling while lying in the giant king-sized bed that Jacob and I once shared.

No.

We never shared this bed.

Jacob never happened.

No matter how many times I tell myself that, I always hear this little voice in the back of my that tells me to stop saying that and to just accept his death.

But every time, I push that voice so far to the back of my head that it is almost impossible to hear.

It's easier to pretend to forget rather than to accept reality.

I let out a deep sigh and push myself up from the fluffy pillows and throw off the huge silky sheets that encased me like a cold tomb. I swing my legs over the side of the bed then pause when I notice Jacob's dog tag lying on the nightstand and his camo jacket lying in a heap on the floor beneath it.

I just sit there frozen and unable to move. I just keep starring at Jacob's personal items and I realize that I've been holding my breath.

I let out all of the air that I didn't realize I was holding in and blinked. I felt something hot roll down my left cheek and I bring my hand up to wipe it away, when I realize that it's a tear drop.

And now that I was finally out of my hypnotic state, I realize that my vision is blurry and my breathing has become labored.

I quickly blink back the eminent tears and focus on controlling my breath before I'm able to calm myself down enough to finally hop down off the bed onto my feet.