The Planet of Retarded Possums And Other Majestic Shit

Intermission

*John Eggbert singing in the background*

Hi guys this is the writer. *walks into field*

It's been a wonderful past few months with you. I've been having a great time writing this story, and I hope you've been enjoying it.

*transition to walking down a dirt road with a dog*

Haha, I just love the outdoors. It's a wonderful place to think about the world. I love taking my ChristianMingle dates out here in the evening. The world is truly magical.

*transition to sitting by warm fire with glass of wine and big furry rug*

*white people laughter*

Haha, you're probably wondering, "what the fuck is going on, I didn't know we had this kind of budget." Well haha, that's a good joke. We don't! This entire intermission is being paid for out of our own pockets. Our very own cameraman, Larry Seinfeld, was generous enough to put up his own kids for adoption to help fund this, haha, isn't that swell.

*sips wine*

So, to answer your question good viewer, this entire intermission is one big apology note! Yes, what's going to happen next will astonish, disgust, and offend you all. I hope you have health insurance, and a funeral plot ready in case somehow this story makes you commit suicide.

*transition to poolside barbecue*

If however you wish to continue seeing these stories, all you have to do is support us by sending in donations to our Patreon and/or my personal PayPal, SexyMami234.

Haha.

*fade in to writer sitting on top of mountain*

And, to help the cause even more, you can buy our new limited edition Steve and Dave Possum toys, complete with kung fu action and working beer keg! (batteries sold separately). Order now and receive a free CD featuring new songs in the story, by such amazing artists like The Search For Satan Has Failed. Songs include:

"Shane Don't Look, There's Blood"

"Spooky Scary Traplords ft, Danny DeVito"

"The Only Living Spoon In New York"

and the famous

"Cocaine Is Fun Kids"

*smiles as sun sets*

All this, and more great offers, for just 19.99 with shipping and handling, we ship to anywhere except Brazil, because fuck you Brazil.

*white people laughter*

Haha, thank you for watching, now lets continue the story.

*John Eggbert singing fades*