Steve's horrible memory kept him from ever memorizing all 16 volumes of "The Space Time Continuum And Other Theoretical Anomaly Incident Handling Guide", and so, he had to be punished. At 10:00 pm eastern standard time Steve was awoken by a large opossum SWAT team, who promptly shot through every window in the house and arrested both Steve and Nicholas Cage The Possum. The SWAT team did a search of the house, ignoring the large bag of cocaine stashed in Dave's room, Dave's dead body still floating in the pool, and Larry the raccoon who had been left under the refrigerator by accident.
Steve and Nicholas Cage were placed in the large holding cell once they arrived at the police station. "Don't worry Steve I know a way out," said Nicholas Cage. Nicholas Cage didn't know a way out, at least not one that didn't involve a large amount of pyrotechnics and two body doubles. So Steve and Nicholas Cage had to stay in their jail cell.
About six hours later, Nicholas Cage was taken in for questioning. Steve remained alone in the cell, and was nearly sound asleep when he heard a large ruckus. Looking out between the bars that held him, he saw a shaggy looking human resisting being arrested. "You can't arrest me! I have my rights! Hail Satan!" the human yelled. The arresting officers, who were too fed up to carry on, opened the door to the cell Steve was in and threw the shaggy human inside. "Hi there," said the human after dusting himself off, "I'm Shane". He offered out a blood covered hand to shake.
"Uhhh...hi there," Steve replied, looking at the hand worriedly.
"Don't mind that," Shane said licking the blood off, "They'll recover...if the cops find them in time". Shane moved in closer to Steve, "If you see a small Hispanic with a hook for a hand, I am not here."
Steve worriedly looked at Shane. Shane gathered some newspapers in the corner and made a nest.
After about five minutes of silence Shane spoke.
"Hey by any chance did you see a small human child disguised as a bear wearing footie pajamas get dragged in here?"
Steve shook his head. This was going to be a long night.
YOU ARE READING
The Planet of Retarded Possums And Other Majestic Shit
RandomHi there friend and welcome to the greatest adventure you will ever read ever filled with cool action and sex and cool things and space my dudes and also guest appearance by Nicholas Cage
