Distant Luminosity | Hanjoo

Chapter Twenty-One

[ a/n: any tøp fans out there or am i the only one? btw this chapter gets quite upsetting and v personal to my own experiences, so major trigger warning ]

I whimpered and tossed my phone off the bed, hearing a snap on the ground but I didn't care. If anything, I'd want it to shatter into pieces. I don't want to deal with that.

Byungjoo looked at me and wrapped his arms around my torso, nuzzling into my hair. "What's wrong?"

I sighed through my nose and explained to him the best I could without my awful stutter. "Someone texted me, I don't know who."

He reached over the side of the bed and grabbed my, surprisingly, unbroken phone. He knew the password to it already, because that's how much I trust him, and he read the text himself. I looked over his shoulder when he typed back.

[4:42 PM] Me: Who is this?

[4:43 PM] Unknown: Doesn't matter.

Byungjoo and I exchanged glances to one another, waiting for another reply.

I can't even repeat what the person typed, it was too long and attacked me hard on a personal level. It mentioned my PTSD somewhere in there, but referred to it as "post-dramatic" and explained why my mother tried to kill me more than three times. Hojoon was mentioned, too, but only for the person to say, "Tell Hojoon he should make it final this time."

I recoiled, feeling my heart dropping to my stomach. Byungjoo turned to me with an angered look on his face. "I'll handle this." I laid my head down on his lap, wanting to watch more but I just couldn't do it. What if Byungjoo gets the hint? I don't want him to think I'm bad. I don't want him to undertake a serious situation as to this just for me.

I didn't realize I was dozing away until he tossed my phone aside on the bed when I don't know how long it's been. "Done." He said and laid onto his back, letting me crawl up and rest my head on his chest. I listened carefully to his heartbeat, enjoying the soft thumps it brought to my ear. I hummed peacefully to the sounds, assuring me he's real and alive.

―

Not much happened in the next few days that flew by, I mean, we finished our project and figured out Hyosang was gay. Sweet. Although, Byungjoo never asked about the incident with the random number. In fact, I've gotten more texts from the dude but I refused to let myself look at them. Not that he would know, that is.

As we scurried to his room upstairs, I instantly curled up in his bed and under the blankets. I waited for him to enter before I popped up and squealed. "Rawr!"

"God damn it, stop being cute." He pushed me back with his two fingers on my forehead. I laughed, taking in the compliment this time because maybe I am cute.

He slid into bed beside me, under the blankets and all, and wrapped his strong arms around me. Our cheeks touched as I hummed and closed my eyes to the feeling of happiness. Although, the atmosphere tensed when Byungjoo asked his question of curiosity. "Hansol, do you really have PTSD?" How was I supposed to answer that?

"Yes." That's how.

Byungjoo must've felt that I gulped and shook with fear, because he raised a hand to stroke the backside of mine, that was resting on my diaphragm.

"You know that wouldn't make me like you any less, right?"

"Of course." He laced his fingers with mine before I rested my eyes again. I was tempted to tell him I loved him, but wouldn't that be too out of nowhere? It wasn't like I was lying, but still.

―

this is too cute at the end like bYE

by the way i have a fever now so NO SCHOOL YEEE

oh and i did post born in the dark if you wanna check it out