The Lonely Swan

Chapter 19

Author POV

Killian's body felt heavy and weighed, as the pounding in his head wouldn't stop. The last thing he could remember was sitting with Emma, holding her closely in his arms. He groans, opening his eyes they were met with a bright light, going to move his hand to cover them but not being able to. Killian's arms were restrained as where his legs. As his eyes adjust he knew exactly where he was, he was laying completely bare tied down to Milah's bed.

For a moment he thought maybe it had been a dream, that Emma wasn't really there. That he'd never left for tea and somehow came here. The door opened, Milah walking in dressed in a skimpy tight leather outfit. "Now you know how I feel when your around another woman," she said. Her eyes were dark making him official scared for his life as she came closer. Straddling herself over his lap, stroking his length.

Milah started getting frustrated as he stayed soft in her hands, something that had turned him on in the past and now making him sick. Killian wanted out, he wanted to fix his life, to start fresh. Seeing Emma had made it all clear, he had been running away from his fears for too long, from the guilt of hurting her. But seeing that she picked up the pieces 'even if it was with the help of another man' and made a beautiful life for herself. It made him realize how miserable his life was, and he didn't want that anymore.

Killian wanted a woman who truly loved him, children who looked up to him, to finally see his mother and brother again and be the family they once were. Killian's thoughts were interrupted when Milah's hands released before wrapping around his neck, and not lightly. Gripping as hard as she could, screaming out words Killian didn't even care to listen. Even though he wanted much more from his life, in that moment he thought what was the point.

Even if he wanted to fight, his body was tied down. Milah's face started to become a blur as he tried to catch his breath but failing. The pain from her small fingers digging into his neck slowly faded as everything turned black.

There was nothing, just pure blackness, no sound, smell or thoughts. But after some time he smelt a sweet scent of flowers, Lily's to be exact. But he was dead? How could smell something? Then next came a familiar voice ringing in his ears, his mothers' voice. It was faint but it was there "Please come back to me, I miss you my little boy" he felt something on his hand, wetness. She was crying, Killian felt the wetness being wiped away and a soft hand placed on it.

His mind was going crazy with thought now, pleading his own body to make any type of movement. To show her he was still in there, wanted to fight, to get his family back. But none the less nothing, not even a slight movement. He became crying silently in his own mind, just wanting to wake before the darkness took over him again.

This slowly become a routine, every so often 'unaware of time anymore' he would feel like he was waking up. But it was still black and unable to open his eyes or move. Only to lay, listen and smell the world around him. His mother & Liam seemed to be there most times, David, Snow, Robi, and Regina also came by often with the children. Even though he wouldn't move it made him happy when the kids would sit on his bed playing around, just not for long as their parents would tell them they have to be careful around Uncle Killian.

Even though Killian had never really met Ave, he just knew when she was on his lap, or cuddled up to his chest. She even began whisper in Killian's ear "I hope you wake Uncle Killy so we can play." It made him smile 'on the inside of course' making him want to fight even more, so he could one day have this own daughter to play with.

There had only been one person yet to visit or at least for him to hear or smell. For all, he knew Emma could be standing at the door watching him in that moment. He keeps telling himself she just wasn't ready, Killian didn't really know much of Neal's death but he knew seeing a man she once loved, lifeless with tubes everywhere and just a year after the passing of her husband, could not be an easy thing.

The next time he awoke 'as such' it was quiet, he couldn't even hear the sound of people rushing up and down the halls. It must have been night, he didn't wake much in the nights and truthful he hated to. At least through the day he would hear his family and friends simply talking about their day and how the kids were. But at night there was nothing, nothing but this own thoughts. Wondering what happened after he blacked out, what happened to Milah. If Emma was even okay. The thought had crossed his mind that maybe Emma came to save him because Milah got to her.

But lucky that night, he didn't have to worry. As quiet footstep come closer and her scent hit his nose "Hey" Emma sweetly said, taking the seat beside him where Lily's was almost every day. Emma's hand found Killian's, linking her fingers around his. Her head coming to land on his shoulder and he heard her quietly and nearly silently cry. Killian wished so badly to move his arm, placing his hand into her hair and tell her it's alright. He wanted to hold her, knowing how hard this was for her. "I can't lose you too" Emma whispers moving to sit on the bed, leaning down placing a light kiss on his lips. "I love you, Killian, I always have."