The Half-Blood Black

Chapter Thirty-Four✨

"Hey." I whisper, going up to Draco in the library.

He turns to look at me but doesn't say anything. After the whole situation at Grimmauld Place, I used a time turner that Sirius had to bring us back to the Yule Ball. I dressed in all black and dragged myself down the hallway.

It was terrifying, seeing myself. Seeing how awful my hair looked. Draco followed me, but he couldn't find me as I held my Yule Ball self captive in a broom closet. As soon as he was gone and everyone had gone back to bed, I placed myself in the common room.

I woke up in the morning extremely confused. It took a few hours for me to realize what happened, and knowing that Draco wouldn't know what happened.

I wrote to Tonks, explaining what had happened. She obviously had no recollection of it either. I'm grateful almost, that I'm the only one who can remember. She kept that information to herself for the sake of not angering Sirius and worrying Remus.

I explained to her what happened with Cedric and she wrote me back explaining that the Order will continue to keep Sirius under lockdown.

"Umm," I whisper, unsure of what to say.

"Umm?" He says questioningly.

I look at the books and try to find one on the Dark Arts but there seems to be none. I can't concentrate with him so close to me, knowing what I know.

Does he really believe he's falling in love with me?

I see a book marked Dark Arts for Beginners and take it off the shelf.

I hear voices on the other side of the shelf and take a step back away from him. I sit myself in the opposite side of the wall, leaning on my elbow.

"Do you need something?" he asks, not looking up. "You don't need me for studying anymore. Especially with Potter and his gang."

"Maybe I just missed you ..." I say.

He looks up then scuffs, turning back to his book.

"Bloody unlikely."

I roll my eyes as two Hufflepuff girls walk by us and lower their heads to whisper. "Take a fucking picture it'll last longer, bitch." I say to the one who stares.

Her eyes widen and she hurries along, her blonde hair flying behind her.

"I think that your American slang is very cute, Lyra," Draco says sitting backwards on a chair. "But what is bothering you?"

"Oh ... nothing." I say taking another book off the shelf. "Have you spoken to your parents lately?"

"My-- what?"

"Just curious."

More silence. The librarian walks by and gives a stare over the top of her glasses.

"I met your mother a few weeks ago." I say, starting casual conversation.

"How? When?" he asks, turning to me.

"I was getting my glasses."

"Good." Draco says. "It might help you see things clearly."

"And what does that mean?"

"I don't know, Lyra. What does it mean?"

We sit in silence. Changing the course of time has been ... mentally damaging.

"You know, Lyra, my parents aren't to be messed with." Draco says boredly.

He's trying to continue the conversation.

I'll bite.

"Do you think I don't know this? How ... you're tied to Voldemort ..."

He just shakes his head, ignoring me.

"I can't take it anymore, Draco." I say exasperated. "This back and forth. Constantly. I mean, honestly, what are we doing here?"

Draco looks up into my face, a pained expression crossing him. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Then don't! What's happening with us?"

"You abandoned me at the ball."

"You're mad about the Yule Ball? You can't be serious?"

"Do you know how embarrassing it was? You just disappeared. Where did you go?"

"So ... you've been avoiding me the last few months ... because your feelings are hurt? You've seriously ignored me for almost 4 months because of hurt feelings?"

"You haven't necessarily come running to me when you need something."

"Draco, it's ... it's more complicated than that."

"Try me then."

I can't tell him about the time turner, about Christmas. It was risky enough being so close to myself, telling Tonks about it. Before I used the time turner everyone warned me about the consequences if someone were to see two of me.

And I can't choose Draco over Sirius.

It's not even a question that I want to cross my mind.

"I can't explain it." I say finally, closing the defense against the dark arts book.

"Then I guess we are back to square one." He replies, turning to his book and pulling a notebook from his bag. "Barty Crouch was asking me about you. Right before he died."

My insides go cold as I shiver, thinking about the fateful day that Harry found Barty Crouch dead. It shook me to my core, being so close to death. Harry and I were walking back after the lake task, I went to say goodbye and catch up with Cedric, to finally forgive him for the ball, when I noticed Harry was worried.

He found the body and I came up behind him. I screamed and clutched onto Harry. He held me in shock and as more people gathered around we were swept away in the mob.

But I won't apologize for being grateful. He was always hiding behind some corner. Showing up in my classes. Sitting right in front of the Gryffindor table.

Harry and I took some time apart, only speaking at night in the common room under the cover of the invisibility cloak.

"You're just telling me this now?" I ask, trying not to let on how curious I am.

"You didn't seem interested in conversing with me."

"You're that petty?"

"Hmm ..."

"Do you love me?" I blurt out.

Draco's mouth opens then closes. He looks shocked. "Do you love me?"

I think quickly, the only way to keep doing what I'm doing is to lie. I swallow hard. "I think I could."

He still doesn't say anything, and I drum my fingers on my book. Harry says that his scar keeps hurting, how he thinks that Voldemort is coming back, and soon. Now more than ever I need to have Draco back in my grasp.

"I ... What are you even doing here, Lyra?" He says rolling his eyes and closing his notebook.

"I wanted to see you."

A familiar look passes on his face and I can tell he wants to talk like we used to. "I think I could love you too." he replies finally.

Now for the chase. 

"Draco Malfoy, you couldn't love me even if you wanted to." I say, standing and placing the book back on the shelf.

"I'm not understanding, Lyra Black?"

"No, you don't understand. You're dangerous. I need to stay away from you."

I start to walk away, making my way down the aisle.

He sighs and says, "You're one of them aren't you?"

I stop walking and turn around. "Excuse me?"

"We know everything about you, Lyra." He says getting closer and whispering to me. "We know there are a group of you. And eventually you will all fall. I don't know when or how but the Dark Lord is returning. Make sure you're on the right side of things when he does."