This girl I can't win?~ (Smexy x Reader)

~House Rules~

**Your POV**

After finishing your meal, which happened to have some of our favorite foods in,  you left into the living room with offenderman where he introduced you to a few pastas you'd heard about.

"Laughing Jack, why did you have to embarrass me at the beginning of dinner like that," you asked.

"I was honestly curious," he answered with a large grin, then began to eat a lollipop.

"Seriously Jack you just had dinner," Ticci Toby groaned.

"So? All the time is candy time. What better a way to sweeten you breath than with some sweets?"

"Sounds like diabetes," Jane the killer answered. 

Jack growled and grabbed her by the throat. "I'm not fat or a sugar addict ok?! Don't judge me!"

You almost stepped into help but Offender blocked your way with his arm. "Is this what you meant about little fights?" you asked offender. 

"Yeah don't worry they'll get over it here in a bit. They always get rowdy over silly things," he replied.

"O-offender... uh, sir..." There was a small girl's voice that sounded from behind you. You both turned around and recognized her as Sally, one of the saddest stories you'd ever heard.

"Oh hi there Sally, what can I do for you?" Offender asked.

"I um... I know I'm supposed to stay away from you, but I.... I just wanted to get to know (y/n), i-is that ok?"

He patted the little girl's head. "Of course sweetie! How about tomorrow? You guys can both check on Jeff and maybe play around the mansion if (y/n)'s up to it?"

You nodded, of course you'd play with poor little Sally. She seemed so shy and sad.

"T-thank you!" She exclaimed, bowing her head. "I-I have to go... Night (y/n)! Night Offender!" She said quickly, then scurried off quickly as if she was embarrassed.

"What a great kid, sometimes I wish she'd had the chance to live out a normal life."

"Maybe she'd prefer it here, you guys take care of each other right? That's better than most humans can accomplish. I mean, after what happened to her..."

"I guess you're right. We're a very close family." There was a large crash behind you two and you turned back to discover Jane had Body slammed Laughing Jack onto a coffee table and broke it, while Toby was laughing his ass off. "Sometimes. We better get out of here before we're punished by Slendy for association."

He grabbed your hand and teleported you both to his room. 

"S-so Offender, if I'm going to stay here... What kind of rules do we have?" You asked. You knew once you'd been branded as a proxy like you were, there was no way you could return to the normal life you'd lived before, even if you wanted to.

"Well no sex while Splendor is home," he answered, then saw you blushing and looking away awkwardly. "Oh wait you mean like house rules. Well, here's probably the gist of what you need to know. Never let Strangers into the mansion unless directed by a leader such as your master or Slenderman. We wouldn't want some destructive human waltzing in here and ruining our nice setup. Another rule, you stay loyal to this mansion, its inhabitants, and our secrets. If you fuck up, bad things will happen and I don't want anything happening to you my beautiful flower. And  Our newest rule which I personally hate but we need to follow it or we can be in danger. Don't leave unless instructed only by Slender, or accompanied by him. That's about all you need to know."

"Thanks Smexy, I didn't want to cause any trouble... Like those guys down there probably have."

"They're going to get into trouble for breaking some stuff, that's about it." He pulled out a cigarette from his jacket. "Well I'm going to go have a smoke, you can curl up in my bed if you're tired."

"Where are you going to sleep?"

"Oh don't worry about me sugar, I'll be fine. If you'd want me to I could sleep next to you~ But of course I won't need sleep if you prefer to sleep alone."

You blushed. "I-I guess there'd be no harm in letting you sleep next to me as long as you promised a few things."

"Hmm~?"

"Don't try anything Splendor wouldn't approve of, and wait till I'm asleep to hop in beside me, please try to keep ample space, I don't want this to escalate any further than it has."

"Anything for you my rose. Night." He then teleported away and you flopped back onto his bed.

"I can't believe I just negotiated to let someone sleep in the same bed as me. Ugh..." You curled into a ball holding a pillow tightly and tried to sleep. It took a long time but you managed to drift off into the eternal dark realm of rest.