Nerds in Love//Cashton

Cal

Word Count: 1594

I sniffled, feeling embarrassed for crying and for telling Ashton that I loved him. It had been a little over a week and everything was out of control.

"Calum?" Ashton asked out of the blue.

"Yes?" I was afraid Ashton was going to start yelling at me again for "lying to him". So afraid, my heart was slamming against my chest, and he could probably feel it too.

"I just realized something."

"What?"

"I love you too."

-

"Wait, are you serious?" I sat up, still straddling Ashton. He nodded as he laced my hands with his.

"All this time I've been......jealous. And I kept pushing it aside and pushing it aside. Any time you and Michael were together, I'd get this knot in my stomach but I brushed it away. When I found out about.....what you....what you did, I thought I was going to lose you. My heart was shattered in a million pieces." I could feel a lump forming in my throat as tears were beginning to prick at my eyes.

"Ash...Ashton..." My voice broke slightly. "I'm...I'm so so so sorry. I didn't want to scare you."

"Then why'd you do it?" Ashton countered, his eyes soft.

"Be...because. I couldn't take it anymore. Don't you understand?" Ashton just stared back at me, reaching up to wipe the tears away. "I...I couldn't take all the pain, frustration. All the fear....the guilt."

"Why guilt?"

"Because I did some stupid shit and thought some stupid shit and didn't want to lose you as a friend so I bottled it all in and I couldn't anymore. I...I'm sorry." I shut my eyes as I felt Ashton used a hand to pull me back into him, his lips meeting mine. We kissed softly for a few minutes before I pulled away breathlessly. "Do you really love me?"

"Yes." Ashton blushed deeply which made me grin.

Before Ashton or I could say anything else, Michael came back down from the kitchen from "getting his drink". I knew why he actually went up stairs, and I was really glad he dragged him and Luke away.

"Is it safe for me to come in?" Michael had his eyes covered with his hands as he stumbled around the room, trying to find the couch.

"You're fine." Michael uncovered his eyes as I was climbing off of Ashton. Michael raised an eyebrow.

"Did I interrupt anything?" Ashton groaned and covered his face while I laughed.

"No." Although, I was working up the nerve to ask Ashton out, but that could wait. Michael sighed.

"The whole point of me and Luke leaving was to let you guys deal with you know..." Michael wriggled his eyebrows and I felt my face heat up. "I'm gonna go back upstairs and you two better deal with that."

We both watched Michael sassily sashayed back up the stairs.

"Why is he so sassy?" Ashton asked, giggling.

"I dunno. Always been that way."

-

"Enamored?" Ashton wiggled, holding the notecard up for me to see the word. Ashton and I were up in his room studying for an AP Literature vocabulary quiz the next day.

"Uh, to be filled with a feeling of love?" Ashton giggled. Ever since our confessions, there had been a slight tension between us. We weren't exactly dating, but neither of us wanted to make the first move.