Mental

Chapter Six|New Perspective

Phil

Phil used to watch the world from a far away perspective. Scene by scene, he let the world play before him like an old movie, noticing every detail, pulling it in to his system. The blue and white films matched his blue and white pills. He let life fly by without a second look.

Dan changed that completely in a matter of weeks.

Dan's hair was brown, and he had light chocolate eyes to match. Brown was also the color of the vest Dan had wore the day he met Phil. He was an image you wish you could put on pause forever. A scene Phil couldn't skip.

Phil had never seen someone so beautiful. If he did, he never cared. Not that he cared for Dan, he just simply admired him the most out of anyone else.

Phil knew Dan was destined to fall in love with him. Boys like Dan always did. Phil used to pretend he loved them, and then break them just as the universe broke him.

Maybe it was because of his unstable brain, or possibly it was a 'masculinity dominance' thing, but there was always a sort of pleasure in having complete control over them.

But the thought of hurting Dan made him feel sick.

And the fact that Dan didn't seem to be interested in him at all made him feel even sicker.

He often plagued himself with thoughts that Dan would have enough of Phil one day, and get a new patient.

That didn't make him feel sick. It made him feel hurt.

A hot guy never much mattered to Phil. They were distractions, pleasurable distractions yes, but irrelevant nevertheless. He slept with them, and dropped them like flies.

What made Dan so different?

***

"Dr. Spaghetti is getting on my last fucking nerve." Phil spat out, clearly over the moon annoyed.

Phil watched angrily from across the cafe as Pj fed Dan a chocolate strawberry, and smiled at him lovingly making Dan giggle. Phil wanted to be the reason Dan giggled like that.

"You know, Dr. Ligouri hasn't actually done anything to you." Chris said, eating his own lunch.

"Are you kidding me? He has done everything to me! He is ruining my chances with Dan, he's crusty, and he probably is also a homophobe."

Chris laughed, "Phil, Dan is his boyfriend, and he's openly bisexual. He can't be a homophobe."

"Whatever," Phil said, too angry to care, "He probably is a sexist, and that's why he dates guys."

Chris rolls his eyes, "Phil, I just can't with you anymore."

Pj feeds Dan another chocolate strawberry which accidentally falls into the guacamole to their chips making them laugh hysterically as if it's so funny that they wasted a perfectly good chocolate strawberry.

"Do you fucking see this?" Phil asked, "They're being so cliche. Chocolate strawberries, really? I could feed Dan a lot better food."

Chris sighs, "You sound so petty right now."

Phil narrows his eyes, "I'm not fucking petty I just know how to treat Dan right, that's all. If I could take him on a date it would be unique. Better than...whatever he's doing."

"Hey, whatever he's doing is working." Chris says with teasing laughter.

"Shut up," Phil says, "Its not like I want to date Dan anyway. I just want him to fall in love with me."