Accidental Intentions

35 • Sleepless

Keith couldn't sleep.

How could he? He was sharing a bed with Lance.

Lance, however, had no such qualms. Shortly after the Blue Paladin had turned his back to him, his breathing deepened to a slow even beat. He was out cold.

How? After what just happened?

Or what decidedly didn't happen. But the intent was there. If Lance hadn't...Why had he stopped? Was it not clear that Keith wanted it just as much he did in the heat of the moment?

Lance may have cooled off, but Keith was on fire. His heart would not stop pounding. Why? It was Lance. They didn't get along. He didn't even particularly like the guy. Sure, they were teammates and all but if Zarkon wasn't being a royal asshole by trying to take over the universe and whatnot, then they probably wouldn't spend much time together.

He glanced at his sleeping companion. Three inches of deliciously tan skin were visible between his collar and hair line. Suddenly, Keith was overcome with a desire to place a kiss there.

"Lance?" he called out softly.

No answer.

He shifted over and inhaled deeply. Citrus and sea foam. Jasmine and cedar.

Whatwhatwhat!? No!

This, this needed to stop. Now. He needed to think this through logically. He had grown up alone. He was starved for affection. Neglect was all he had ever known. So then when he was shown some attention, his desire to be loved exploded.

So what was Lance's excuse? The guy had a family, people he could go back to. It wasn't like he was hungry for attention. No, scratch that. Lance was a ravenous attention whore. Not because he was starving, but because he was a glutton.

Was Lance so desperate, knowing that Allura was untouchable regardless of how alluring she was, that he was merely venting his frustration out on Keith? That stung a little, knowing that he was just being used. Knowing that he wasn't truly wanted. But Keith admitted he wasn't one to talk about empty, angry sex. He had been in Lance's shoes, and had done so much worse. But realizing that didn't make it hurt less.

Yeah, it hurt, Keith was mature enough to admit. But not because he was trying to earn Lance's affection. All he wanted was to be accepted wholly and completely. For who he was, not for being in the right place at the right time. Or the wrong place at the wrong time. If anything, he needed a friend, not a fuck buddy.

And yet Keith could barely trust himself to move, with Lance's sleeping, trusting, hot body lying next to him.

He hated this. This part of himself. Everything he did was just so...much. He envied Lance, cool as a cucumber no matter the situation. He adapted, rolled with the punches like lazy beach waves. But Keith, everything was fire, rage, and passion. No chill™.

He rolled into his side so Lance was behind him.

Ignore him. Just forget he's there. You can do it just sleep.

But Keith didn't sleep.

He just stared at the stupid recreation of Earth's summer sky, admiring the accuracy of it. Lance must have really paid attention in astrogeography. Sleep never came, but he lay there unmoving until the beads began to fade in the morning light. Then he jumped at the sound of a horrendous rending of metal. Shiro burst in.

"Lance! This has gone too far! I want you to apologize to Katie right now! Oh, hi Keith," Shiro greeted him before giving him a double take.

Too tired to explain, Keith ignored the situation and asked, "What'd he do?" in a knowing tone.

"He..." poor Shiro seemed to be processing the scene a little too hard. "Is he wearing...pajamas?"

Lance stirred. He stretched dramatically and yawned lazily like a cat as he threw an arm around Keith, "Mm so noisy."

Then he placed a casual peck on Keith's cheek and flashed him a brilliant smile, "'Morning, princess."

This fucking guy.