Delightfully Chaotic

I Miss You

A/N: In honor of national coming out day I decided to write another chapter this week. I myself cannot decide on my sexuality but currently identify as a lesbian. You are not required to label yourself so please don't feel obligated to. This is YOUR life, don't you ever forget it. I would love to hear your stories if you'd love to tell me them in messages or here or in my tumblr AddlctWlthAPen (spelled with 'L's instead of 'I's). May your life be filled with happiness by being who you are. And if you're not currently out, may you be granted the strength and support to embrace your sexuality with ease someday! Stay strong and know we're all here to support you! Happy National Coming Out Day!
❤💛💚💙💜

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Carm was finally asleep. It was hard to outlast her when it came to sleeping, she was a vampire after all. I decided to sneak out for a bit to clear my head. Knowing she wouldn't like this I slid out of her arms and placed my yellow pillow in her arms to fill the void. I'd only be a few minutes.

Slowly walking out the creaking door trying not to disturb her I make my way through the halls. With all that's been going on I hadn't checked my mail very often and decided maybe 4 in the morning would be the perfect time.

As soon as I got to our mail slots I notice mine was full of letters.

"Oh my.." I whisper to myself unlocking the slot and pulling out the letters. Some were hand written from teachers and friends I had to leave behind. I thought it was sweet of them to think of me and decided I'd write them back another time. When I got to the bottom of the mess I found a note from my father. His penmanship was easy to sight. Opening the letter quickly to find a small note in it.

"Hey trooper. How's school been? I haven't heard from you recently and was getting a little worried. I guess that's how college life is, huh? You forget about your old man and begin to have your own adventures. Well I don't really blame you. I've had you on a chain for quite some time now. Word has it you may possibly have a.. girlfriend.. I guess that may be what's been taking up your time. Don't ask me where I got this information, we both know I have my ways!"

I roll my eyes at the thought of my dad spending most of his time trying to meddle in my life.

"Well, I can't wait to meet her! Maybe bring her by for thanksgiving! If you're coming home I mean."

I frown.

"Don't forget what I told you when you first came out sweetie."

"Thank God you finally said it?" I thought to myself.

"And no not the first thing I said."

I laugh at this realizing he'd know what I was thinking. Then I remember what he said.

"Yup. 'You better find a girl who deserves you'. And I really hope you have. Keep in touch kiddo, I hope to be seeing you soon. I miss you. I love you. Don't forget your pa."

A tear falls from my eyes. This letter was from months ago. How could I not call? I wipe my eyes trying to contain myself. I'll call him later today. As over protective as he may be, he had his moments of understanding. He just wanted what's best for me. How would he feel about Carmilla? Has he been watching my blogs since this letter? All these questions running through my mind.

I knew that if he saw how much Carm means to me he'd understand her.. differences.. from us and accept her. I grab the rest of my mail and begin roaming the halls, smiling at the thought of Carm and my dad meeting. Oh, how chaotic it may be, but how much calmer I may feel knowing that he knows the girl I'm with.

I reach our room and find carm still asleep. Her arms tightly wrapped around my yellow pillow. She loved that pillow. She was even stealing it before we were together. I was never sure why so I'd definitely have to ask sometime.

I slowly begin to slide the pillow out of her arms and maneuver my way into them. Her arms wrapped firmly around me.

I begin to close my eyes until I hear her speak softly,

"Where have you been, cupcake?" She gently places a kiss on my forehead.

"So much for Lauronica Mars, I can't even leave your side without you noticing." I smile and wiggle myself into her as close as I can get.

"Slow down there wiggle worm," she laughs, "I'm not going anywhere." She holds me tightly and I begin to close my eyes relaxing in her embrace.

I don't know what I did to get so lucky. It hasn't been easy and it sure as hell isn't getting any easier but she keeps me strong. Knowing that I have someone to help me when I need it always gave me a warm feeling. She encouraged me to find strength on my own but has been there for me every step of the way, along with my father and my friends. I couldn't ask for much more.

"You're my everything Laura." She whispers, probably assuming I'm asleep. I feel a warm soft kiss placed against my lips and her movements begin to settle.

"If only you knew." She says before drifting off to sleep and I swear, in that very moment, I heard something we both considered to be impossible. I'd have to figure out if it was my imagination or actually happened.

In that moment, I heard a single beat from her cold and lifeless heart.