Delightfully Chaotic

It Should Have Been Me.

Laura's POV:
I lay with my head buried into Carm's still neck. Her movements had stopped 10 minutes ago but my crying was barley coming to a hault.

I feel the dean pacing back and forward behind me. Her nervous chatter going on as she paces.

I sniffle and wipe my face as best I can, not letting Carmilla's upper body touch the ground.

"C-cant you do anything?!" I shout towards the dean. Her pacing stops as she looks at me with complete anger.

"If it wasn't for you and Einstein this never would of happend you annoying little girl." She spits with anger.

Laf.

I look towards where Laf's body was but they were no where to be seen.
Could Laf really have cowered away? I wouldn't blame them.

I sigh removing a few strands of Carmilla's hair from her face. It was such a painful sight to see. Her beautiful peaceful still face facing mine with her eyes sealed. Her body limp and cold inside my hands. The blood from her wound also ran cold. It was enough to send tears back to my eyes.

I couldn't stop imagining that she'd wake up any moment now, those beautiful deep brown eyes of hers staring into mine telling me Everything's going to be alright cupcake. It was heartbreaking knowing it was only my imagination.. she was really gone..

Why didn't I listen? Why couldn't I have just stayed put? She'd still be here if it wasn't for... me....

I begin to cry again cupping her face with my loose hand while placing soft kisses onto her lips then cheek.

"I would say I admire your passion but this is all your damn fault." The dean says from behind me.

"Why don't you just take what you needed from her and leave. Better yet, why don't you just kill me now. That was your plan all along wasn't it? Running towards me with that sword. You were going to kill me weren't you? What's stopping you now?" I say taking my sweater off and bundling it up as best I can then placing it under Carmilla's head to lay her down. I kiss her lips one more time then stand in front of the dean.
"Well? What's made your stone cold heart thaw? I'm ready." I say staring her down. Her facial expression blank as if she's at a loss for words.

She scoffs.
"I've got nothing to take here. You've killed my easiest option to the other realm. Without her I've got nothing-"

"Without her you're just stuck here. Without her I'VE got nothing!" I say pushing forward. The dean stops me with her powers.

"Calm down puppet before I end you right here."

"Please do." I say looking down at Carm's still body. I feel my body go numb. She wouldn't want me to say things like this.. she wouldn't want me to die. But I couldn't bare living without her. It was all too much..

The dean shakes her head. "It'd be too easy to end you here and now. You seem to care for my Mircalla quite a bit-"

"It's Carmilla and I love her. But you wouldn't know a damn thing about tha-"

"Please" she scoffs and let's out a little laugh. Her powers keeping me in my place as she paces around me.

"Let me live and I will destroy you for all you've done." I say trying to move my body but it's frozen against her powers hold. She let's out a laugh.

"You? You couldn't hurt a fly dear." She's in front of me now. Her face tilted and eyes full of curiosity.
What could she honestly be thinking right now..

She places her hand over her chin rubbing it slowly.
"Leaving you alive will allow you to suffer as I have to in this miserable place." She looks at Carmilla's body then back at me.
"I think I'll manage until I find what I need to get to the other side. You, on the other hand, shall suffer." She releases me from her powers hold and I collapse to the floor like my body was pudding. My body ached and felt weak.

"There are other ways through this gate. Carmilla was a loving admirable daughter until she met you. I shall cherish our good memories, and they shall haunt you, for as long as you shall live."

"Please just.. if you're not going to end me here then just.. leave me and her alone.." I say sniffling while crawling back to hold Carmilla.

"It's better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all naive little Laura." The dean says placing her hand on Carms cheek. I contemplate hitting her hand off of Carmilla but don't find the energy to.
"I will leave.. for now.. I've got to do this the hard way thanks to you. Finding a light in the darkness is going to be such a time wasting thing." She says looking down at me with anger rolling her eyes as I cling on to Carmilla. Finding light in the darkness? "Once I'm past those gates you've got no idea what's coming for you child."

"I-I don't care anymore." Tears fall from my face. "Do your worst. I've lost all I have to your hands." I pull Carmilla's body to mine holding it close.

The dean laughs.
"You have yet to see loss and pain tiny helpless Laura" she laughs again and snaps her fingers disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

I release the tears from my eyes holding onto Carmilla.

"Why did you have to leave me, it should have been me Carm." I lay my head on her chest. "You stupid vampire. You had so much to live for. I should have said it sooner. I should have told you how much you meant to me. I didn't think this w-would be.." My breathing hitches. "The last time.."

I feel my heart racing trying to beat out of my chest. It was like someone had ripped a hole in me. I felt so helpless, so lost, so guilty...

I hold her body close to mine cherishing the last moments I could have with her before I'd have to part with her body for good until I hear deep and heavy breathing from afar down down a tunnel.

I look up thinking some sort of animal may be traveling through the tunnel until I see a breathless Laf stumble through.

"L-laf?" I say picking my head up from Carms chest, wiping my face as best I can.

"Laura!" They yell. "We. Don't. Have. Much time" they say taking a deep breath in between each word.

"Time?"

They pull out a small stone from their pocket.

"Laf.. what is that?"

"A light in the darkness..."