30 Days Left

29 Days Left

"Brian honey, wake up or you'll be late." a female voice said to me. My mother. I can only count using my fingers the number of times a body I inhabited is shaken awake by a parent.

I haven't got the time to access but I know its Monday, a dreadful school day.

Brian's mother leaves him to prepare for school. I start the day with taking a shower, I always do. I never had the luxury to do so back then.

"Brian dear, hurry up. Pete says he'll drop you off." Brian's mother said.

"I'll be down in a few." I replied.

Pete is Brian's older brother. He works in the city and slept over for the weekend.

I finished the needed preparations and got in the car in less than 15 minutes.

Pete started the engine and drove towards my school.

He doesn't start a conversation. I use this time to access quickly.

There were times, when I still had my own body, that I felt bouts of depression, loneliness and uselessness. I remember these feelings; for today I'm splashed with it like a bucket of ice cold water. I needn't access deeply for the memories are fresh and Brian thinks of them constantly.

I feel sick.

"You okay pal?" Pete asked "Want to head home?"

I said no. I don't want to be seen by Brian's mother.

"Just leave me here. I'll manage." I told him.

He pulls the brakes and I get off. He leans outside his window and asks, "You'll ditch school?"

I replied honestly, "I don't know."

"Just be home in time for dinner." he said, and added, "Mom will be worried." He drove off towards his work.

I'm not really good with these things, the emotional stuff of life. You might think I can handle myself better because I change bodies daily; but I can't.

The body starts to walk. I pull myself together. I started to access real time.

There's only a ten thousand to one chance that you can find someone for you in your adolescence. Brian believes he will never find someone since his father left them. He stopped believing in love. He focused everything in his studies. Everything was going well according to plan, until he met Haley.

Haley writes and she writes well. Brian once found a notebook containing written poems; haikus, sonnets, and at the last page, a prologue, to an unwritten novel. Not knowing the author, he kept the words and treasured it.

He found out the author in the end, and it was Haley. They hit it off after then.

Have you ever met someone you can be your true self with? Someone so easy to talk to and be around, it's like breathing. It was like that, a ten thousand to one chance. And Brian and Haley were the ones.

But fate is cruel. It always is. Haley was shot by psychopath along with five others in a nice and unadulterated park where she was waiting for Brian. It broke his heart. It still does, after all the funeral was held only a week ago.

I see this all in Brian's head. The body stops walking and I look at where I am. The cemetery. Figures. I see a headstone. It's Haley's. I see a bundle of tulips -her favorite.

I start to cry. Not because the body makes me. I cry because I feel for Brian. I cry because I don't know if I will ever find someone. Someone to love enough to make my world crumble if their gone. I'm crying because I'm sad. I'm crying because I'm afraid. I'm running out of time and it makes me cry.