Day 6552

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Cruel. Savage. Barbaric. Inhumane. Call me all the bad names in the book. I deserve it.

I called in sick at school. I can't learn anything in this condition.

I'm dying. This pain in my heart is killing me. I can't breathe without a heartache. I feel this empty hole inside me. A black hole that is all consuming.

My head hearts. I can't feel anything. I think my heart is missing. I know it's there it pumps blood and all, but I can't feel it.

My body is shaking because of pain. This is my punishment, I deserve this.

I'm dying and I deserve it. The emptiness is killing me, but this is what I deserve.

I walked towards the thicket of trees. When I'm far enough so no one could see or hear me, I started to scream and cry.

I know I deserve this. What I did to Beth was unforgivable. I deserve all the pain in the world.

I don't deserve Victor. His goodness and everything about him is too good for me.

I scream because I know all of this. This is my punishment for all the bad things I've done. I do not deserve to be happy.

I screamed my lungs out. I screamed with everything I have. I screamed. I screamed. I screamed.

I screamed why. In this world filled with people, why me. I screamed why, because I deserve to be in pain, I ask why me. Why me? Why me?

I screamed. It's the only thing I can do now.

�/T8�.�

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