behind the scenes [completed]

Chapter 30

Please Excuse Any Mistakes
2 WEEKS LATER
CARTER'S POINT OF VIEW

I continuously refreshed the page over and over.

Our subscribers count was going up a few subscribers each minute I refreshed.

I felt the couch by my head dip. Gabbie leaned her head down to mine and looked at the phone screen.

She let out a small laugh, "You've been doing that for the past hour, Carter." she said.

I sighed and turned off my phone, eyes catching onto the subscriber count one more time, 96,459. We were so close to 100,000....

I looked up at Gabbie. Her silver-purple hair had faded a while ago, causing her to dye her hair a pastel blue.

She stared down at me with her brown eyes with a smile.
She quickly dipped down, placing her lips on mine. I kissed her back hesitantly and she gently placed her hand on the side of my face, kissing me slowly.

Gabbie pulled away slowly, keeping her hand on the side of my face, her pinkie lying just under my jaw.

I looked up at her, eyes searching her face.

I remember my mom telling me something once, about how to see if someone loved you as much as they said.

'It's in their eyes' she had said, 'Just look at each other, and look in their eyes, you can tell if they actually like you. It's sounds cheesy I know but...'

I looked into Gabbie's eyes, almost feeling guilty that I felt obliged to actually follow my mom's words.

Her eyes still held their dull, dark color. She seemed happy but it just didn't feel right.

Looking into her eyes, I didn't feel she liked me as her boyfriend.

The corners of her lips turned down slightly, "What's wrong?" She asked curiously.

I curled my lips as she pushed her hair behind her ears.

"F*ck," I mumbled, sitting up and leaning against the couch.

She raised an eyebrow, gesturing for me to explain.

"You don't like me as a boyfriend do you?" I asked in a rushed manner.

She shrugged and leaned against the arm of the chair, "I mean, it doesn't seem like you like me as your girlfriend" she said with a grin.

I furrowed my brows.

She rolled her eyes, "I'm not blind, Carter, I see the way you look at her, the way you talk to her, or talk about her," she paused, "Or when you film a video with her." She said, much more quietly this time.

I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling my chest tighten at the thought I've been pushing down.

I felt a hand on my knee, causing me to open my eyes.

Gabbie was in front of me, "Carter, it's okay. It's not like I'm mad" she said with a small, sympathetic smile.

"But--"

"She's dating Anthony, I know." She said. She sat back on her knees, putting her hands on her dark, ripped, jean clad thighs.

I sighed, looking forward to the wall.

I had been hoping that I wouldn't have to talk about this, to anyone, and it would just go away.

Gabbie gently grabbed my chin, turning my head toward her.

She quickly leaned forward, placing her lips on mine. She hesitated, almost pulling away, lingering for a few seconds before she slowly pulled away, falling back on her legs.