(Jalex) The First Step Towards Repair

Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you

TRIGGER WARNING: CUTTING

Chapter 15

Tonight will be the night

that I will fall for you over again,

don't make me change my mind.

Alex

I emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around my body. I stood in front of the mirror and ran my hand through my hair before I took note of the scars that decorated my arms. I turned over my arm, examining my scars as I trailed a finger lightly above them. They were definitely healing, but... I sighed and looked at the fresher scars. Those were from three days ago.

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(3 days ago - Tuesday)

I glanced at the person standing in front of me. He mimicked all of my movements. I stared back at my own reflection in the mirror before looking away sadly. I was so fucking ugly. I sighed and went to sit down on my bed. Why did Jack like me? I was hideous. I was pathetic, and worthless. Does he even like me? Maybe he did this out of sympathy. Maybe everything is a lie. That's right, Gayskank, no one likes you. You're pathetic, and you should go fucking kill yourself, the back of my mind hissed. I bit down on my lip as I fought back the tears. I searched the drawers of my bedside table and shakily took out a razor. I sat on my bed, pressing the blade onto my wrist and sliced it across my arm, causing blood to ooze out of the cut. I bit down on my lip and held back the tears before I sliced the blade across my arm a couple more times until I heard my phone vibrate on the table. I took in a shaky breath and placed the razor down, grabbing my phone. It was Jack.

'Aleeeex. I miss you so much already! :( I was sick, so I couldn't come to school that day. Can I come over maybe?'

A small smile appeared on my face. I glanced down at my bloody arm and back at the text. Maybe it isn't fake. Maybe he really...

I sighed and took the razor with me, heading towards the bathroom. I should wash this all off before they see. I washed turned on the shower, letting out a hiss as the water touched the wounds. I washed off the blood on my arm and the razor before I exited the bathroom, hiding my blade in the cabinets before I went to reply to Jack. There was another text.

'Babe? You okay?'

I slided my finger across the screen and typed out my reply.

'Hey Jack! Aww, my poor Jacky is sick. And you can't expect me to reply when I'm showering y'know, you perv. Yes you can come over, I'll pass you your homework when you're here :)'

The showering part was definitely a lie, but I didn't want to tell him. He doesn't need to know.

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I snapped back into reality. Jack doesn't need to know about these cuts... Maybe I should hide them. I got up and grabbed a long-sleeved shirt, putting it on along with a random pair of shorts before I sat down on my bed. I took a glance at the clock that lay on the bedside table. It was 22:01, and he hasn't arrived yet. Just then, my phone buzzed and I picked it up from my bed. There was a notification - a text from him. I smiled.

Jack Bassam Barakat<3:

'Sup Lex? Give me five mins. I'll be there soon :)

I glided my finger across the screen as I typed in a reply before pressing 'Send':

Okay! I can't wait to see you. :D

I leaned against the pillow of my bed, softly humming to myself when I heard a knock at the door. "Yeah?"

I watched as the doorknob slowly twisted and the door pushed open to reveal a certain skunk-haired boy clad in a Green Day shirt and a pair of jeans. My smile widened to a bright grin. "You came!"

Jack grinned and closed the door lightly shut, sitting beside me on my bed. "Hey, 'Lex," he said and gave me a light kiss on the cheek. I flushed. There was an odd feeling inside of me, as if there were butterflies in my stomach. "Hi..." I mumbled shyly and he giggled. Holy fuck, that giggle of his. It was so fucking cute. Oh my god.

He let out a low chuckle. "Aww, my little Lexi is blushing," he said with a mischievous grin.

I punched his shoulder lightly. "Shut up, asshole," I muttered and he let out a laugh.

"Alex?"

I looked up at him. "Hmm?"

"It's really hot in here, why're you wearing a long-sleeved shirt?"

Oh shit.

"Uhm. It's actually pretty cold," I lied. Jack didn't buy it. He frowned and adjusted his seating position to face me.

"Tell me the truth, 'Lex," he said, his tone filled with sadness. I bit down on my lip guiltily and slowly rolled up my sleeve to reveal the horrendous scars. Jack gasped slightly and slowly ran his finger down my arm, trailing the recent cuts. He gazed sadly into my eyes, but I looked away.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled and blinked back the tears that fought to spill down my cheeks. He planted a kiss on my cheek again and rubbed my arm gently.

"But... Why?"

I shook my head. "I... I don't know. I..." I sighed and took in a deep breath.

"I was doubtful. I hated me. I still do, and I doubt you feel differently. You probably are doing this just because you sympathise me, because I'm pathetic. I completely understand if you do, Jack," I said with a brittle smile. He had a stunned look plastered onto his face which morphed into a hurt frown.

"Alex, you're wrong. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me," he said and grabbed my shoulder, gazing into my brown orbs, "I love you, so very much. And you shouldn't hate someone so perfect and wonderful like yourself," he cupped my face and kissed my lips softly before he pulled away. A smile tugged at the corner of my lips.

"Do you really?"

Jack beamed, "Really really." I laughed lightly at his response, he was so cute. The bright grin of his, and his skunky hair and brown eyes... He's perfect.

"Alex, can you promise me something?"

I gave a shrug. "It depends, I guess."

"Will you try not to be so silly as to think you're worthless? To me, you're worth a million bucks and all my time," he said with a grin. I blushed and muttered something under my breath.

"What?"

"I promise, you stupid thing," I said a bit louder and kissed his cheek before blushing slightly. He ruffled my hair and gave me a kiss on the forehead.

I smiled. "I love you, Jack," I mumbled, stifling a yawn as I snuggled into his chest. He returned a warm smile back and pulled the covers over both our bodies.

"I love you too, Alex."

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A/N: aw this is possibly the cutest chapter i've written. I just wanna thank you all for 350+ reads in the span of one day. I mean, wow. thank you all!

This chapter goes to the little piece of shit @pipewrenchnimrod who is the Jack to my Alex ;)

Also.

Certain bits make no sense, so i'll edit when I can.