Slipping Through My Fingers~ Beau Brooks

Chapter 13

Chapter 13

ZOE

I woke up in a cold, plain, basic looking room. Wearing hospital clothes and lying in an uncomfortable bed. My eyes adjusted to the world and I was back to life.

"What's going on?" I asked Beau, who was sitting in a chair next to my bed.

"Beau?" I asked

He didn't answer me. I think he knew something that I didn't.

"Zoey, your awake." A doctor walked into the room.

"What's going on? Where am I?" I asked

The doctor came closer to me and sat in the empty seat beside Beau, who was still in his own personal bubble.

"You have just had surgery Zoey. You have been resting in this hospital for five hours now. The good news is we have successfully removed the cancer tumour in your stomach." The doctor said.

I turned to Beau.

"Why are you so upset Beau? I'm going to get better"

I looked at the doctor.

"I'm going to get better, right?" I asked

Beau stood up from his seat and walked over to the little window and stared out to the outside world.

"I'm afraid, things aren't as easy as that" The doctor said.

"What do you mean doctor? The cancer tumour is gone. You took it out?" I asked

"Correct, but we done some tests and the cancer...well, it has spread." The doctor told me.

I started to laugh.

"No, you've made a mistake. I'm going to be fine" I said in between laughter.

The doctor took hold of my hand.

"I know this is a lot to take in"

I slapped her hand off of mine.

"No! Your wrong. I'm fine. I'm O-K ok. There's nothing wrong with me. I feel fine. I can run around, do cartwheels, whatever. I'm stronger than ever!" I said.

Slowly I started to climb out of the bed, my head was spinning like crazy. But I was going to prove I was fine. And then, I fell straight back down onto the bed.

"Don't strain yourself dear, you don't want to pull a muscle." The doctor said.

Beau turned around to face me, It felt like a lifetime since I had last seen his perfect face. He opened his mouth, about to say something. But just started to sob uncontrollably. The doctor guided him back over to his seat.

"Zoey, Beau. I know this is hard to take in. Nobody deserves to be told this, especially you two young lovers-" The doctor started

"I bet you say that to all your cancer patients" I replied sharply.

I couldn't feel anything, crying, laughter, anger, smiling, nothing could block the fact, I had cancer.

"How long does she have left?" Beau asked, with tears still in his eyes.

"Well....usually patients with cancer can survive a maximum up to 5years. But you Zoey, you're looking at a maximum of a year, maybe even less" the doctor said.

Beau looked down to the floor, tears falling down his face and hitting off the cold hard ground.

"I should leave you two to talk" the doctor walked out.

"Zoe, I-I. Don't know-" he started

"I should be the one crying, not you Beau" I said.

"How can you be so chilled about this Zoe?" He asked

"I'm going to fight this" I said with determine in my voice.

"Your dying Zoe" he replied

I turned to him, feeling braver than ever.

"That may be the case Beau. But I'm not going down with our a good fight"

He took a hold of my hand.

"I can't loose you Zoe. We both know I'm not that strong" he cried

"You need to be strong Beau. We both do. If I'm going to die, I'll die happily." I said.

"What do you mean?" He asked

"Since I was five years old. I wrote out a list, of three things I needed to do before I die. And I am determined to do them" I said.

"Zoe...I-" he started

"No Beau, this isn't about you, it's about me. I only have about a year to live. I'm going to make the most of it. Your going to help me, aren't you?" I asked

We wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

"I'll always help you, no matter how big or how small of a job you need"

"Good, can we talk more about this tomorrow. I need my beauty sleep" I laughed

Beau nodded and then placed a kiss on my head.

"If the doctors say I can't stay here with you. I'll be back in first thing tomorrow" he said.

"I'll see you tomorrow" I smiled and closed my eyes.

I was just about to fall into a deep sleep and I heard.

"Zoe. I love you. Always remember that" and I felt a kiss on my lips, a delicate kiss that felt like forever since I had one from his lips.

And I heard his footsteps walk out the door and I heard the door slam shut..

I opened my eyes, and began to cry. This was the only time I could cry. I didn't want Beau or the doctor to see me upset. That would just make me look weak. I wanted them to thing I was strong.

I let my mind think about everything. About my mum and dad. My brother Chris. My best friend Emma, Daniel, and Beau. These were the people that made such an impact on my life and I was never going to see them again.

I was dying.

Soon I would be non-excistent, forgotten, unimportant. Nobody would care. Would they? Everyone would replace me.

Emma would find a new friend to take my place.

My mum and dad would just give more love to Chris.

Beau would find a new girlfriend.

My heart felt like it was snapping in half. I couldn't die. I was only a kid. I had so much to do. So much to see. So much to learn. So much to discover. I couldn't just leave all that behind.

I buried my head into my pillow, weeping and weeping. I needed to stay strong. I needed to fight this disease.

I wiped away my tears and convinced myself I was going to win this battle. Failure was not an option.

Not now, not ever.