Jar of Emotions

Faith

Alone in the middle of the forest. Sorrounded by the trees, Tall tress.

Sun rays from the sun is being seen.

Me, Barefooted wandering around feeling nothing. Every step that I take makes a sound of a cracking dried leaves.

My long white dress flows freely with the leaves. Hair is being blown up by the wind and as if it touches my face.

As I walk by I saw him...

The one that I am longing for...

The one that I misses so much...

The one that is so dear to me...

The one that I love the most...

The one that I am capable of loving him whole...

Loving him with all of his flaws...

Bittersweet memories rushed through me...

Can I hug him? Can I still hold his hand? Can I still ruffle his hair?

Here I am, seeing him.

Slowly, he walked away.

My whole felt numb.

Tears rolled up to my cheeks.

Here I am, standing feeling but nothingness.

Nothingness with pain.

Staring at him walking away.

Can't you hear my silent pleas?

Can't you hear my silent cries?

You brought color to my black and white day.

You brought laughter..

You brought smile on my face..

You brought meaning to my meaningless walk everyday...

You brought love ...

But seeing you walk away from me changed me little by little..

If you had brought me love back then, but now.. You brought me Pain.

If you had brought me smile on my face but now tears streaming down on my face..

If you had brought me color to my every day but now it is all black and white again...

My faith in love died...

I have lost my faith on that..

Starting from that day, all that I am feeling and the believe in love vanished...

That time makes People change.

Change is not static, it is dynamic.

People change, people will come and will eventually go.

Some people will pass by to brought some remarks on you..

But leaving is a choice. Getting out of this relationship is a choice. You made your choice to leave me and i cant do anything about it.

Being in this situation is also my choice. Loving you is my choice.

It's not destiny that dictates us.

It is our own choice to make.

A smiled. A bitter smile.

I stared at you walking away and a light caught my attention... I followed that light..

I stared at the majestic place where I am standing..

I am on the edge of a cliff with a river down there. I saw a big tree on my right and sat down.

I closed my eyes and tilted my head up.

The wind blew and touched my skin.

This is the beginning.

Beginning for me to stand up from being stumbled..

Beginning for me from bending down on my own knees..

And it is my choice to not look back and to stand up again.

As I see the light.. I felt home.