My Life

chapter 14

Joe POV

oh you idiot why did you say that to her. Ugh the pain in her fake laughter and her face killed me but I dont want her to like me cause who wants a boyrfriend who could die any moment. I havent got much time left lindsay said I have 1 month. I told my mom that and she's so strong for going it through with me. I love her im gonna miss her. I closed the house door tossing the key on the little table we had beside the door.

"joe sweety is that you?" I heard my mom ask

"yea your home already I thought you were gonna be late" I said walking to where her voice came from which was the kitchen. She looked at me and smiled but she had red eyes and she was trying not to cry. I hate putting her through this. I went to her hugging her

"mom please dont do this everything will be fine" I said kissing her head. I wasnt sure if it will be but I dont know.

"nothings gonna be okay what am I gonna do without you why did god have to punish my baby you never wanted anything bad for other people. Your the light making people happy what am I suppose to do without the light?" she said frantically running her hands on my shoulders than up to my face. I grabbed her hands as tears slipped down my face I kissed her hands at the side of my face.

"im sorry" I said my voice low and cracking she just shook her head and hugged me again. I tried to calm her down and it worked after a few minutes

"honey I almost told Dianna but I covered it up I swear she didnt notice" she said now stressing over this.

"its alright atleast she doesnt know still. Just please dont tell her I dont want anyone else knowing." I said

"why? why do you wanna go through it alone people who love you should know" my mom said and I sighed. I wanna go through this by myself if I beat it ill feel proud of myself if I dont it will save the heartache for everyone they wont have any memories to miss me by.

"Dianna barely knows me. Please dont. Just lets get some rest and we will talk about it later alright I love you" I said kissing her forehead

"ok honey I love you too" she said and I walked away to go to my room. I changed and went to my bed. Here comes the worse part while laying in bed: thinking.

I dont know what I did wrong this disease just appeared. I just collapsed one day in college and then thats it out of school on medication and on a search for a new heart. Your life can change in a second anything can happen. Make the most of it whatever your baggage is forget it try to enjoy your life. If your in a dark place look for the light. Please dont sit there hating on your life cause its not gonna change automatically you have to take action. This disease however there is no way out it takes forever to find a new heart to fit the right type of blood and see if your body rejects it or not.

Thankfully I was pulled out of my thoughts when the door opened. I smiled at my mom as she came and laid down next to me hugging me as I put my arm under her head. I kissed her head

"dont think too hard. I just got a call from your dad they are coming in 2 days I told him too and he wants to make the most of it. Your whole family is with you supporting you we all love you" she smiled up at me

"I love you guys too" I said smiling and looking up at the ceiling.

"well im staying here im sleep with my baby" she laughed and I chuckled

"mom im not 5" I said looking at her not minding if she slept here or not

"your still my baby" she said sighing and I smiled reaching over and closing the lamp. We both fell asleep as soon as the light turned off.