broken boy ❀ stiles stilinski

Are we back to being friends?

I don't know how long it had passed before I was able to slowly open my eyes. They felt heavy as if I hadn't had enough sleep. But sleep wasn't the cause of why I was awakening, it was Theo. He knocked us all out and then just left. What was the point of that? Why not just end it? Why just leave us there? Why did he let us go?

Thought after thought filled my mind. I couldn't keep up with all these different emotions, though it felt that some of them weren't even mine. It feels like a part of me, isn't mine anymore.

I forced my eyes to open as much as I could. I have to get up.

I see around me and we are still at the school hallways. Of course we are still here, where else would we be?

It has to be some hours later in the night as it's still dark outside, but it's not daytime either.

Around me I see all the pack still unconscious to the world. How can I be awake before all of them?

I came to the conclusion that they are my pack. They always were and they will always will. I turn towards where Scott lays and I get up walking up to him. I kneel beside him, shaking him a little to see if he wakes up.

'Just leave them. You can still have a chance to leave them on they're own.'

His voice resonates in my mind but I try my best to ignore it. I can't let him win now.

Scott starts to move a little, his fingers twitching every now and then. They are all waking up, slowly, but they are. His eyes start to open, it seems that the light is making it hard for him to see clearly. 'Stiles?'

It felt weird hearing him again while being way too close to him. I missed having this closure to someone even though at some point I didn't know this. I wanted to get close to people but I just didn't know how to fix my problems, I still don't know how to fix a lot of things.

There's just things that stay broken forever.

'Yeah.' I still didn't know how to act around him, I tried to hurt him, even kill him. There's so many things that I want to tell him but I'm not able to. It's been so long since the last time I was with any of the people around me and it's making me feel very out of place.

'You are here.' Scott sounded surprised. 'I thought this was all a dream but...you are here.' His eyes filled with sadness, a sadness full of happiness.

'Yes, I'm here.' I don't know what's wrong with me. I want to talk to him but the words don't leave out of my mouth. It's really starting to frustrate me and I just want to hit myself right now. Why can't I function properly?

I am angry at myself but I don't let that show through so Scott doesn't start to ask questions.

'Are you okay?' I won't answer anything with the truth, because the truth at this moment in our lives hurts. Hurts deeply. I can't be speaking of this right now, I just want to forget of all this.

'Yeah, I'm fine. Just...don't know where did...Theo...go.' Can you see the problem here? I'm shakin. My fingers are trembling and It's getting harder to breathe. I can't keep this up anymore. I didn't allow myself to rely on anyone before and I never knew it would affect me this bad. I can;t keep trying to be strong in front of anyone because I am definitely not okay. I want to say the truth but I would be just a burden in their hands. There's so many things happening right now, it would be too selfish to make them care for me. i don't want anyone's pity. I'm not a charity case. But at the same time I need someone to tell me everything is going to be ok, as cliché as it sounds.

Scott didn't notice my distress. Being a chimera confuses me a lot. There's things that I would have done before and everyone would be at my side in a second, but now everything just passes unnoticed.

'He just left? Did he tell you anything before leaving?' Scott sounded concerned, I wouldn't blame him. Theo is someone that would do anything for power. He is manipulative and a liar.

'No. Not that I remember.'

I remember perfectly. I remember every word he told me. But how could I tell him all of it when I was the one who brought it upon him? If it weren't for me he could live a normal life. as a human. I took him that night into the woods, and since that day I've ruined his life.

'We will find a solution to this. We will get rid of him and the rest of them.' Scott reassured me. I know he will try, but can we really fix this? Or is it too late to do anything?

I want to say those three words. Not the typical three words of love, no. not those ones. Another three important words that summarises what it's going through my thoughts at the moment. But for some reason I get anxious every time I think about it.

Through the corner of my eye I see that the rest are starting to wake up and get up from the floor.

Scott gets up from the floor putting his hand in front of me to help me get up as well. Once we are standing up. I do something I didn't expect to happen. I didn't notice what I was doing till I felt the crushing warm feeling of Scott's arms. The hug expressed all those unsaid words we had. Everything from the past being forgotten. It amazed me how such simple actions between us meant so much to me. The fact that after so many years he is still next to me even though so many people get annoyed of me after the first minutes of knowing me. I could never thank him enough for everything he has done for me.

My breathing has gone into a more normal rate. Finally I am a bit more calm than before.

'I missed you.'

I said.

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