"what do you think you're doing?" Carlos's words were frantic and loud as he marched across the airport lobby.
I whipped around quickly and dropped my purse that was in my left hand.
I cursed under my breath – Carlos was supposed to be at the gym with the guys while this happened.
he wasn't supposed to find the note I had left him until I was already gone.
it had been two weeks since Jake and I had our conversation on the patio. and it had been a week since I told my Mom about my plans.
it was strange at first – seeing my Mom after she had been gone for way too long. but I found out that it really was fate that she was here. it was sign.
we were each thinking about each other at the same time and wanting to see each other, and now it was happening.
"Carlos," I said softly. I reached my hand out to touch the side of his face, but he jerked himself away. "please don't be like that. I already explained everything in that letter,"
"is that seriously how you wanted to leave? just by leaving me a lousy note telling me that you've suddenly decided to go live and follow through on the job in Colorado? you just moved in with me,"
I blinked quickly and turned away to fight the tears that were stinging my eyes.
my Mom was waiting for me near the gate - she was going to be the flight attendant, and I glanced towards her with Carlos still behind me.
I felt bad for leaving like this, but it was just something that I really needed to do.
"I had plans with my life after college, Carlos. and now I'm finally seeing my Mom... I just feel as if I have to do this," I explained.
Carlos cursed and shoved his keys into his pocket before pushing up the sleeves of his jacket. "that doesn't mean you just get up and leave your entire life behind like this!"
"I want to try this out, Carlos!" I nearly shouted. "I want to get out of Houston and see how I can adapt to this job and find out if it's really what I want to do. there's nothing for me here anymore,"
I lowered my voice, not wanting to create too much of a scene and draw attention - specifically to Carlos. especially since he wasn't wearing a disguise.
"is that what I am to you, then? nothing? José, Marwin, the rest of the guys...Noel...Giannina...we're all nothing,"
I groaned. "no! Houston is nothing to me right now, not you-"
"but we're here in Houston. we're a part of it,"
"you guys are the only good thing about this place,"
Carlos's face fell as he mulled something over in his mind. "I'm not enough, then? I'm not enough for you..."
"not now, Carlos,"
Carlos sighed loudly and picked up my purse for me before handing it to me. his actions took me by surprise, but I didn't say anything.
I took it from him and watched while he tried to steady himself.
"Colorado is only a couple hours away," he said softly. "maybe I can go see you after this week,"
my heart was ripped out of my chest in that moment. I loved Carlos to death, but I had never imagined him wanting a long distance relationship in this situation.
I never imagined Carlos in this situation with me. I needed to do this all on my own. I needed to be alone.
"I don't know if that's a good idea," I said.
