I thought about my decision I really didn't like clubs or parties so I'll just go back to the hotel.
"Could you walk me back Patrick?" I asked.
"Sure," he smiled.
We started to walk back to the hotel, things were quiet for a little bit so I decided to say something to end the slience.
"Did you have fun in there?" I asked.
"Eh it was alright. I'm not much of a party I'm more of a quiet and meaningful conversation guy," he replied.
"Yeah I guess I am too," I said.
"I can tell," Patrick smiled, "so why did you agree to going in the first place if you knew you weren't going to be happy?"
"Well I just thought everyone should be happy. You guys are way more important anyways," I explained.
Patrick shook is head, "no way Emma, out of the five of us you're the most important one. I don't want you to worry about us and our happiness, just worry about you and be happy."
"Awe, Patrick," I smiled weak.
No one ever told me to just be happy, I constantly put others feelings in front of mine because I thought they were more impotant but maybe he's right maybe I should just worry about me.
"Don't look so sad Em, come on let's go back to the hotel and we'll do whatever you want," he smiled and took my hand.
I like it when Patrick and I hold hands its nice, he's such a kind-hearted person and so easy to talk to. Why don't I spend more time with him? Oh yeah it's because Joe always steals me away, is he jealous anytime I'm with Patrick that he has to steal me away from him? I know the guy said he wants to be with me but sometimes I think he should be a little more fair.
When we finally reached the hotel I went straight up to our room, Patrick followed behind me. I really wanted to stare out the window again. I know it sounds weird but the veiw is so pretty that I wanted to see it at night. Patrick seemed a little more than surprised when I went right over there. But, I didn't care this was what I wanted to do the most.
"You must really like the veiw," he said.
"Yeah I do its really pretty, I could honestly sit here forever," I smiled.
Patrick walked over and looked out the window with me, "Yeah I does look nice."
He wrapped his arms around me from behind and rested his head on my shoulder.
"I can see a prettier veiw than this one though," he said.
"Huh? What's that?" I turned and asked him.
"You," Patrick kissed me.
I smiled and walked over to my bed which still had his stuff on it.
"You put your stuff here on purpose this morining didn't you?" I asked.
"Yeah it was sort of my devious plot so you would sleep next to me," Patrick blushed.
I smiled even though he called it 'his devious plot' I couldn't stay mad at him. I didn't really want to move his stuff either, I liked sleeping next to Patrick he was so wam and cuddley and I felt happy with him. I sat on his bed and patted the space next to me, he came and sat down. He sat with his hands folded on his lap looking very shy and awkward. I grabbed his hand and held it for a while and smiled at him hoping he'd get the idea. Patrick smiled back and I knew he got what I was trying to tell him. He leaned in and we kissed. We kissed for a while then it turned to full on making out, I layed back on the bed and he layed on top of me, he runned his hand up and down my thigh and started kissing my neck. Things continues to go further, I took off his shirt and kissed all over his bare torso without thinking about what was going to happen next. I the back of my mind I could hear my conscience telling me not to have sex with him, not to sleep with either of them. I ignored it for a while but it just kept getting louder. No matter how much I wanted things to happen, my conscience was right and I immediately stopped.
"Em are you okay?" Patrick asked.
"I'm fine," I looked down.
He didn't think nothing of it and leaned in to kiss me again but I pushed him away. I couldn't I wasn't ready for something like this to happen. I sat up on the bed avoiding all eye contact with Patrick, I felt so ashamed and embarrassed even though nothing happened.
"Okay somethings wrong what is it? You were okay a second ago just talk to me about it," Patrick's sounded conerned.
I knew I could trust him and talk to him about anything so I had to be honest with him.
"I-I'm just not ready for things to happen like this I'm sorry," I kept my head down.
"Em, it's okay if your not ready," Patrick lifed my chin and smiled, "I never want to push you into anything. I want you to be comfortable on your own time."
I smiled back, I felt relieved Patrick was okay with everything He's so sweet and always knows what to say.
"Thank you," I kissed his cheek.
"Let's rent a really hilarious movie and we can sit up here and just eat a bunch of junk food," Patrick smiled.
"Okay, that sounds fine to me," I smiled.
For the entire night we spent watching really funny movies from the 80s and ate a bunch of candy, chips, and other junk. I was a really good night I was glad to have spent it with him.
