You don't know my story

Chapter sixteen- daddy issues

Me and Nate are finally back. Everyone else is staying a few more nights. I'm glad I got the hell out of there. I can't believe what happened today with blake. I thought I would never see him again but I guess I was wrong. Me and Nate are going to see him mom and his brother and sister. We just pulled up to his house.

"Are you okay?" Nate asked.

"That's the 40th time you have asked me that." I laughed.

"Just checking babe."

"I know thank you" I kissed his check.

"You missed." he said leaning to kiss my lips. whenever he kissed me it was like fire hit my lips I loved the burning feeling. The way he made me feel was amazing. he made me feel alive. We got out and went inside.

"Jaz!" said the two voices I loved. they came running up to me and I'm picked the both up.

"How are my favorite twins." I said and kissed there foreheads. Nate took Parker alway from because I was struggling I mean come on they were like 50 pounds each. Nate put his arm around me and kissed my forehead. I head a click. We looked over and his mom had took a picture of us. She told the twins to get down so she could take a picture of just us. So they did.

"Welcome home!" she said walking over to hug us. we smiled and hugged her back I loved his mom she was like my second mom.

"Mommy! can we get ice cream please." said the two little ones.

"Babies mom mud tired we will go tomorrow."

I looked at Nate having a silent talk with him with our eyes.

"Mom we can take them." said nate. and I nodded.

"No you do-" she was cut off.

"Yay!! let's go!" they screamed. we laughed and said goodbye to nate's mom and went out to the car.

Nate put parker in his car seat and i put bella in hers. We then got into the car and started to drive. Nate was so good with his little brother and sister. He would make a great father one day i new he would. I have always wondered where his father was. Everyone say he has 'daddy issuses' i never really new what that meant because no body would tell me so i guess i will have to ask him one day. 

"Bubba Parker called me a mean word!" Screamed bella from the back seat.

"no i didnt!" yelled parker. i smiled i love kids they are so funny.

"Parker, Bella if you do not stop screaming no ice cream if you dont have anything nice to say anything at all. do either one of you want a time out?" he asked

"No." they whispered. After that they were quiet the whole way there. Once we got to the ice cream shop and parked the car we got the kids out. I held bella's tiny hand in mine. Nate took my other hand in his and on his side with his other hand was parker. We all walked into the ice cream shop. It was night time so there were only one other person in the store. An older women came behind the counter with a smile. 

"What can i get you?" The kids told them what they wanted and she made them and i told them to go sit down and eat while me and Nate got ours. They did as they were told. Me and nate ordered what we wanted.

"Yall have a cute family, very well behaved kids." I started blushing 

"Thank you." Nate answered and i looked at him. We paid and walked over to where the kids were sitting. 

"Cute family?" i asked him and he smirked

"I didnt want to make her fell bad for thinking we had kids. so hush." he said i laughed at him. Bella and parker had ice cream all over their little faces. we cleaned them up and went to get back to the car. When we were driving the kids fell asleep so we had to carry them in and put them in bed when we got home. We then left and went back to my house which is just next door so we just walked. 

"Nate can i ask you something?" 

"Sure." 

"Why does everyone say you have daddy issues?" i asked. i felt him tense

"Well my dad use to be a really great guy and father. After parker and bella was born he started drinking alot and he started hitting my mom. I was 16 at the time and the twins were 3. He got drunk and started yelling at my mom i took the twins and locked them in a room, and i went back down stairs and we was standing over her hitting her and i mean not just hitting i mean punching in the face and kicking her. she was coughing up blood. I went over and pushed him off her and he started hitting me. We started fighting people must of heard the yelling because the police showed up and took him to jail and we havent seen him since. After that happened thats when i started to sell drugs and take them, drinking, partying. I met this guy maked Luke and he was like may dad he gave me money to take care of my family as long as i sold drugs for him then i started to street fight. Well one night we were at some party and this slut came and sat on my lap and one thing led to another and thats when i started sleeping around. Thats how i know Jacks i use to sell with him. But one night i came home and my mom had caught me she had seen me on the streets and she new what i was doing. she talked to me and then i told luke and i stopped selling and fighting." He fiinished we are now on my couch.

"Damn.." 

"yeah thats why i have daddy issues as everyone says but not anymore just back then it got to me ya know."

"I understand." I said 

"You know some times i still feel like i should of died. Like i shouldnt be here nate." I said in a low voice.

"Why would you feel that way?" 

"Because sometimes i start thinking off everything and i feel numb like i cant move or breathe but i know its not my time to go i just i dont know."

"Do you still cut?'

"Nate." 

"Do you still cut?" 

"Sometimes."

"Damn it Jaz. I thought you were getting better."

"I am nate but i cant change over night okay i just fucking cant stop the nightmares that come every night. As much as i would love to i CANT!" 

"Shh i know im sorry i riased my voice." He said as he wiped a tear from my cheek. 

"Lets go to bed." 

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Hey guys! i was bored and wanted to add another chapter! so yeah keep reading and tell me what you think i would love to know!

XO

sid