Potatoes

Coo-coo-ka Choo

I am a famous eggman
and my eggs are mighty strong;
they're up on legs and running off
before I bang the gong,
so eager to make breakfast
you must disregard their pong.

'An egg for every circumstance!'
that is my motto loud
I bellow from high rooftops, as
of this I'm mighty proud.
The dewdrops drip right off my tache;
my head's inside a cloud.

I teach them in my eggy school,
of Comprehensive kind,
to cover every subject well
nor leave a jot behind;
for when I've done a thing it's done;
there's nothing more to find.

A yolk for every angle, that's
my maxim as I spring
from tip to tip of daffodils
with energy and zing,
to bounce along iambic lines,
pontificate and ping!

And my meringues are fluffiest;
they prance in whitest slippers
such crunch and yet such creaminess
inheres within these nippers.
Let them pep you up today;
don't sag like aging kippers.

I know you must be starving, for
you look a little worse;
and, though we all are terminal,
no need to book your hearse
when you can leap with eggs so high
about the multiverse.

Nutritious are my recipes,
my learning oh so nice;
you'll not get such a bouncy ride
at any lower price.
Don't wander off or fall asleep;
you'll miss the dancing mice.

It's effortless! My eggy rhyme
could pace the Roman miles,
Londinium to Hadrian's,
my soldiers wreathed in smiles.
Persuasion is my middle name
and innocent my wiles.

I know that you are wondering
when will this breakfast end
I'm sure those sounds weren't desperate pleas
you wouldn't so offend
my eggs who give their choline best,
your livers to befriend.

And though, you know, we never know
how eggy-rhyme shall stop;
some say it's cosmic mercy; but
some feel their hearts flip-flop;
some sigh, 'What's on the player, mate?
I think I'll watch a cop.'