Big Time POV Switch

Kendall's POV: I've Spent Enough Time Moping Around

*Kendall’s POV*

               I’ve cried too much these past few days. The studio isn’t the same without Addie. I was really looking forward to teaching her more on the guitar. Any ways, I guess it’s better that she’s not here, she’s getting help. Still, this is really hard for me; I never expected that I could love a person so much.

               Currently I’m sitting in my room, lounging on the bed with my guitar in my hands. I’m strumming random chords that pop into my head. There’s a quiet knock on my door. “Come in!” I call absently. Lately I’ve been pretty brain dead, feeling numb. I don’t even have the decency to give the guys the time of day. Logan walked in the room and sat on the end of the bed.

               “Hey,” he said.

               “What?” I asked. I wasn’t rude, I wasn’t curious, I was monotone. There was nothing emotional in my voice which is unusual, even for me; people usually refer to me as a sweet and caring guy, I guess I forgot about all of that when I had to say goodbye to my daughter.

               “The guys and I have decided that we are going to try and do something fun tonight,” Logan began, “Dustin is coming over, and so is Kevin and Kenneth. We want you to come out of your room longer than five minutes at a time.”

               “I don’t know if I can,” I replied.

               “Your own blood brothers are coming over and you won’t even come down to say hi to them?” Logan questioned me.

               “Are they here now?”

               “No…”

               “Then when they get here, I’ll poke my head into the living room from the stairs and say hi,” I told him.

               “Kendall don’t be this way,” Logan pleaded with me. He looked at me with those big, brown, puppy eyes of his and the shell over my heart shattered. I can’t resist that face, no one can resist that face-I swear it’s like his super power or something.

               “Fine,” I said as I got up and placed my guitar in its case that was on the floor next to my bed. I stood up and stretched. “It will be nice to see my brothers again,” I said as I walked over to my dresser to pull out some clothes. “And did you say Dustin was coming too?”

               “Yep!” Logan replied enthusiastically.

               “I haven’t talked to him since our winter tour last year, it’s been too long.”

               “See, this is good! You’re getting out of your room, you’re going to socialize. For one night you’ll forget about Addie and everything will be just fine.”

               I started to cry. “Get out,” I told him.

               Logan covered his mouth with both hands. “Dude I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. I really didn’t, it just slipped. I know how much you miss-”

               “Logan, just stop talking,” I said as I fought back tears.

               “I-I didn’t mean to, honest,” he said.

               “Just go. I’ll be down in a minute.” Logan left the room. After the door was shut I cried. I hadn’t wanted to sob in front of him so I waited for him to leave. I honestly haven’t wanted to sob at all, so I haven’t been crying much-just pouring my thoughts, every sing one of them, into new songs.

               I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes with my sleeve. Then I changed out of my ratty pajamas into something more presentable for company. I plastered a smile on my face and drew one more deep breath as a I opened the door and rushed down stairs to be with the rest of the guys.