Martin Garrix Imagines

Fatal messages Pt.2

                                 grief n.
Intense sorrow, especially caused by someone's death

Your POV:
*Amsterdam, Tuesday, 9:22 am*
1 week later...

The sound of hooting cars slowly awakes you from a recreative slumber. It's been the first time after your son's death that you slept all night through. The other nights you always woke up because of terrible nightmares, which have drained you more than any other nightmare before.

You were discharged from hospital three days ago, you are feeling physically much better again, but the loss of your child still haunts you deeply. In the past few days you've managed to grieve for your babyson, which, you feel, has helped you in a way.
Compared to you, Martin was acting differently.
Physically he was there for you, he held you when you were crying, he woke you up when you had those terrible nightmares and did all stuff you couldn't do because of your injuries, but you noticed that mentally he was absent. He didn't show any emotions, just like that day in the hospital.
You know that every person mourns in a different way, but still you are worried about him. If you could you would help him, but you don't know how.
This is why you've decided to give him some time for himself.

Bright sunlight peeks through the curtains, shining directly in your face.
Slowly your eyes flutter open, to your surprise you feel rested and much better than the past few days, that felt like pure hell.
As you scan the room you recognize that Martin isn't in bed anylonger.
Questioning yourself, why he is already awake, you get up in a sitting position.
While you are redoing your messy bun you seem to hear a sound. Sitting still you listen to the sound for a while, which sounds like quiet sobs. Quickly you put Martin's hoodie on and leave the bedroom, quietly following the almost unhearable sound.
It doesn't take you long until your search ends in the living room to find Martin sitting on the couch. Scanning him you see that he holds a picture in his hand. You feel tearing up as you spot the light blue cap he bought for your baby when you found out that you were expecting a boy. He was so excited and immediately bought baby clothes on that day. The sight of Martin is a kind of relief, you knew that he was mourning, but you didn't know how to help him. Now you can.

Slowly you walk towards him, his sobs become louder with every step you take. Carefully you take a seat next to him and pull him in a hug, this is the moment he finally lets go of everything and just cries.
Fighting your own tears you close your eyes. He has been strong for you all the time, now you want to be strong for him.
For a while you two just sit there, trying to comfort him you gently rub his back.
"I miss him so much.", Martin sobs.
"I know, babe. I miss him too.", you respond running your fingers through his soft hair.
"I wanted to be strong for you, but it's so hard. I am so sorry, Y/N.", he speaks burying his head in your neck.
"It's okay, don't feel sorry. Cry if you need to.", you tell him and plant a kiss on his cheek.

You two remain in the hug for some time, while you gently rub his back you hear his sobs becoming quiter.
"Thank you that you were there for me the last few days. I don't know, if I could have gone through this without you.", you say in a moment of silence and pull out of the hug to look at Martin.
"You don't have to thank me for that. I promised you to be there for you, no matter what.", Martin answers putting his hand on your thigh.
"And I promised you, that I will be there for you. It's hard now, but we will survive this together.", you reassure him, giving him a smile. A small smile forms on Martin's lips, it's the first time that you see him smiling ever since that accident happened.
"I am so happy to have you. I don't know what I would do, if I lost you in this accident.", his voice cracks, but he pulls himself together.
"Don't worry, I won't leave you.", you promise him and bring your hands to his face, wiping his tears away.

"He'll always be a part of us. He'll always be in our hearts.", you speak as you take the scan of your baby in your hand, you holding one side of the picture and Martin the other one.
"True, he will always live on in our hearts.", Martin adds and pulls you closer to him.
You know that mourning isn't easy, it's painful and longsome, but there is one thing you know. As long as you have Martin by your side it will be easier to go through the pain and try to start from the beginning.