Twisted knots

•3•Please

After that fight with willow and ocean and I finished my drink Blake took us home. I wasn't piss drunk or even drunk. I got kicked out by my brother. Shitty isn't it?

"Is it because of your parents?" Blake asked. I kept my eyes locked on the window watching the trees and houses go by. Time felt like it was speeding up so fast. We arrived home in no time. I still haven't answered Blake. He didn't bother asking me again he just left it at that.

I sit in the car with Blake that seemed like hours just looking out the window to the house.

"Look I don't know what you have gone through at all , but I'm sorry for asking. Just forget I asked." Blake turned his head and look at me. I didn't bother turning my head.

"After my mother died my dad became an asshole and would abuse me. Within a month of my mothers death he married someone else. Holden's mom abused the both of us. My dad didn't do it that much but when he did. I was sent to the hospital. I would be dead if it wasn't for Holden. I never wanted to stay home. I became different. I was a sweet innocent girl, now ...just look at me I'm a mess. All I do is get in trouble and put holden through so much shit. I'm shocked he hasn't kicked me out." The tears rolled down my face as I still look out the window. Blake got out and went to my side as than I realized it was raining as if the sky was crying with me. He opened my door and got me out taking me in the house. We got in and he told me to sit on the couch. He leaves to the kitchen and than comes back with a cup of warm coffee.

I look over and try to smile but fail. I say thank you as my voice cracked from the sadness in my voice. Blake gets closer to me and puts an arm around me.

" My mother and dad abused me too. I was sent to live on the streets . However, one day an old women saw me. I was close to death. I was there for what seemed like months on end. She sent me to the hospital . I was skin and bone and so cold she and the doctors though I was dead but for some reason I made it through. My mom and dad were sent to jail after I was able to move and talk. I had to learn how to walk bc I didn't know how to. The old lady took me in after I was strong enough. She became a mother figure. She saved me . I did too put her through so much. I bullied kids and was sent to a special school because of my behaviour." He than started crying himself. I put my coffee tat I took little sips out of on the coffee table. I got on my knees in front of Blake sitting on the couch. I grabbed his chin and pulled it up so he was looking at me. I used my thumb to whip his tears away.

***Blake's POV***
Once Jordan touched my face I felt something. I don't know if she did, but it sent a whole through my body. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. Just being this close looking in her eyes just is amazing. I couldn't help myself. I moved in closer and kissed her feeling my body go numb. She was kissing me back I'm sure she does feel something, but I can't have anything with her. If we do Holden's taking her and leaving. I pull away and get up and walk to my room. Closing the door.

***Jordan's POV**

He just left when we were in the middle of kissing. I felt something, something that I want to feel. I get up and walk to his room. I walk in without knocking or asking . He wasn't there. I go to his bath room but just before I just about to open the door I hear Blake. He's talking to himself.

"I can't, I just can't do this. I fucken like her so much but I can't have her or she's gone for ever. I feel myself around her. We act like best friends, and the feeling I just love when I'm around her touching her." I open the door to see Blake with his hands on his face.

"Blake?" His head shots up. His eyes red and swollen. He gets up and hugs me holding me in his arms.

"I'm falling in love with you Jordan every second I'm with you. I want you, but I can't have you." Can't have me what is he talking about?

"Your probably wondering why. Your brother said if anything happens between us, he's taking you and your leaving far from here without telling me where." He looks me in the eyes. You could see the sadness in his eyes.

I than did what I did when we were on the couch; grabbing his chin whipping he tears away with my thumb and kissing him.

"I want you Blake." I say truthfully. He pulls away again.

"NO! I want you, but I can't. If I do and your brother finds out he's leaving with you. Than your gone forever."

"Than we can keep in between us."

"He will find we can't. I'm sorry." He pushes pass me walking fast. I chase after him. He grabs his keys from the counter and runs out the door to his car and starts it and leaves. I stand on the deck watching him durn his wheels driving down our lane way. Tears run down my eyes.

I go to the only place I can be alone. The cabin back in the woods down by the creek where no one, but my brother knows of.

Running as fast I can in the darkness as it consumes me getting darker and darker.

Finally getting there I open it up and turn on the Christmas lights around it for light. Still beautiful as I left it . I walk to the little couch my brother gave me to put in it.

I grab the scrap book of our family before I met holden and his mom and before my dad became an asshole.

Smiling turning page after page I start to feel the cool summer air coming from an open window. Getting up to close it I see a deer and her fawn by the water drinking.

Than the picture fades and goes black.