Deception

Its Okay

The air around Stiles thrummed statically, his energy buzzed under his skin. Like angry bees buzzing to get free. Stings at the ready.

Almost like insects were crawling inside him fighting to get free.

He couldn't get rid of her face, he couldn't get rid of her expression. She was there, clear as day, forever etched into his memory and it seemed into his magic.

"What's happening to me?" Stiles spat out.

He had keeled over outside with Kirah, in their usual training spot.

He was breathing hard and his energy clenched and buzzed inside him, angrily and it hurt.

"You are loosing control over your energy" Kirah said quickly.

"No shit" Stiles snapped.

"You need to calm down" Kirah said hurriedly, he crouched down next to him.

Stiles gave him a poisonous look.

He grimaced in pain.

Now and again sparks of golden energy, criss crossed Stiles body. He couldn't hold it in. His energy was to agitated, he was to agitated.

"Mieczyslaw..." Kirah said more gently.

"How can I? I keep on imagining her face. What she must of gone through, her magic and-and oh god she's just a kid" Stiles said, his voice shaking.

His Training Master was studying Stiles and his energies reaction. He frowned.

"It's not just that, is it?"

Stiles didn't respond.

"It's everything, their betrayal, your torture-"

Kirah's words helped a headache to form, it throbbed inside Stiles head.

"-his death and now her death, someone you think you could have saved-"

"Just stop talking" Stiles growled, eyes glowing.

"-someone who still had so much potential and years ahead of them"

"Stop it!" He snapped.

"Mieczyslaw..." Kirah sighed.

Stiles shook his head. He whimpered in pain again. Headache dying down but the rest of his body still was painful taunt, his energy not helping him, it felt like it was the actual one that was causing the pain. Reacting to his emotional distress and its own.

He desperately tried to keep his magic inside, scared of what would happen if he let it loose. It was to out of control, to wild to let through.

His emotions and magic was going hay wire.

Kirah grabbed his shoulder, turning him to face him.

"After everything that's happened, she's the last straw isn't she?" He said softly.

"I can't..." Stiles cried out.

"Mieczyslaw, it's okay to be angry, it's okay to feel these things. Your magic is getting out of control because of you're not letting yourself feel how you should and your magic is doing that for you and reacting badly"

Stiles didn't respond, curling up more around himself.

"But" He said, his voice trembling "It hurts to much!"

Kirah made Stiles look at him, his eyes wide with hurt but still full with so much clouded emotions.

"You need to calm down and let yourself feel them, all of them"

She was just a kid, she was just a kid, how could Fritz do that?!

But then even now, especially right now his time with Fritz was still fresh in his head.

Why then was he so shocked and horrified?

Even his magic was recoiling inside him.

"I can't, if I-If I do that then I'll loose control" Stiles groaned.

Kirah didn't reply for a little while, as if thinking something over.

Finally...

"Then loose control"

Stiles eyes widened, his breathing picked up in panic.

"What?!"

Kirah repeated slowly "Then let yourself loose control, if that's what you're magic wants to do, let it"

Stiles body trembled even more, the golden streaks sparking from him becoming even more erratic.

"I thought you told me a while ago that sorcerous shouldn't loose control over their magic?!"

Kirah nodded but something seemed to gleam in his eyes as he said "Yes, but you're a different kind of sorcerer, aren't you? You always have been"

Stiles didn't respond, sweat had started to form with holding everything in.

"It's been millions and millions of years since our ancestors became sorcerous. Why do you think Madam Rucia was sent to keep a close eye on you? You did notice that you seemed to be under her supervision much longer than normal sorcerous"

Stiles didn't respond but yes, he had noticed that but he'd thought that was because of the Lords vision of him drinking from the Silver Soul, not that they were intended in him because he used to be human.

It was so strange thinking people were interested in him for having been human, when for a long time it had been the opposite.

Kirah looked him in the eyes, both their eyes were glowing, sorcerer to sorcerer.

"Let it go Mieczyslaw. It's okay"

And Stiles didn't need any more encouragement. He opened up and he couldn't stop the tears from falling.

Everything coming to ahead.

He didn't notice the way his magic had reacted to him letting it rain and loosing his own control over it.

He only noticed a warm body encircling him in a him.

Stiles cried and sobbed and let it all loose. Crying into Kirah's shirt.

Kirah sighed and this damaged sorcerer in front of him. He wondered if Mieczyslaw would ever properly heal.

In this moment he also didn't tell Mieczyslaw what had actually happened when the young sorcerer had let go of his magic.

Mieczyslaw would see for himself..

The grass all around them had died.

A couple of trees had been wrenched from their roots.

Plants around them had been shredded or where black and dead.

Now this Kirah thought, was some seriously angry magic that Stiles had inside him.

And Kirah did not want to be there when Mieczyslaw faced whoever was the subject of his and his energies fury.

But still, with all that Mieczyslaw had gone through. It was understandable. It was okay.

So now he did all he could to help him.

"It's okay Mieczyslaw, it's okay" Kirah soothed.

It's okay to be angry.

"It's okay"