Into the Deep

How Many Times

How Many Times

"How many times will I have to say that I like you? How many 'good morning' and 'good night' will I have to send for you to feel that you're so special to me? How many smile will I have to give for you to smile at me even the slightest one? How many days will it take for you to love me back?"

I wrote on a paper. This is actually a letter for someone. 

And suddenly, a drop of tear suddenly fell. 

As soon as it flow through my cheeks, I wiped it away. I've crumpled that paper and looked myself at the mirror. 

My tears were really escaping through my eyes. 

"Hey fool, how many tears will you have to burst every night for him to notice that you're hurting deep down inside?" I said to myself, still looking at my own reflection. 

"How many times will I have to remind you that he's madly in love with somebody else? How many times will you have to punch your chest and tell your heart to stop hurting because of him?" I said again to myself as I've seek for the night sky. There was no signs of brightness of moon nor stars outside. 

"I hope the sun will shine bright tomorrow. I hope its rays will dry my inner tears. I hope its light will be the sign that I'll stop loving someone who brought darkness to me." 

I came back to the mirror. "Hey fool, please don't be fool tomorrow. Good night." 

And the next day, I saw him, and I know to myself, I will continue loving him. 

"How many more times will I have to love you until my heart fell out of love for you?" I said through the air, as he walk towards the girl he really loves. 

"I really am a fool. Because every day, I can't even control myself to love you more and more and more."

"And more."