TRITTANY: Finally Noticed

Not What I'm Saying

TREVOR

Lamar and I had left the party in the early morning and headed home in a cab. The whole drive home, I was staring out of the window, thinking about her. The way she looked when she first walked, the hug she had wrapped me in, the conversation we had had in the kitchen and then the one that we had had as I left for the night. It was all in my mind as I stared at the dark streets rolling past.

I felt like seeing her had shocked me out of this daze that I didn't even know I had been in. With all that had been happening in my mind that was Brittany related and with her being so far away and my only way of seeing her being through her Instagram posts or that one off FaceTime call, it had been hard to remember that she was a real person. It was like I had formed this fake Brittany in my mind. As dumb as it sounded, I almost wished that was the case. Everything Victoria had said about Britt had been weighing on me so much that I began to think of things about her that never before had crossed my mind too much. Like her being single, and the many chances she had to not be single, and the way she looked. At some point in the time that she was gone, I figured all of these thoughts were simply there because I hadn't seen her in so long. Like I was imagining her to be so much hotter than she was, so much funnier than she had been, so much more infectious than could be possible. I knew that as soon as she walked through the door to Vic's apartment, this perfect picture I had painted of her would disappear and the real Brittany would just be the way she was.

However, what I hadn't expected in the slightest, was that she did walk through that door for the first time - I realised that Real Brittany was even more beautiful than I had thought up Fake Brittany to be...

And only now, when she wasn't here and I was finally able to think for myself, I realised that I was officially going to be psychologically screwed for the next eleven months.

Or maybe that was just the beer.

At this point I had no clue.

~

The following day, I woke up around ten or eleven am and immediately felt queasy. For the past month, feelings like these had been very common. Usually however, I had to try to figure out exactly what it was that was making me feel this way. It always ended up being something like reading a Trittany hashtag or remembering a conversation with Vic or thinking about what I'd heard from my brother and my mom. This time however, the feeling required no deep contemplation before I had figured out what it was. I knew straight away. Today, Brittany and Victoria were going for coffee and I had extreme nerves about exactly what Victoria would reveal to Britt about all that had happened since she was gone. I assumed I would've been even more nervous if I hadn't have nipped this whole situation in the bud the night before, as soon as Britt had brought it up.

*Flashback*

"You know Vic," Brittany shrugged.

My worry was that I did. I did know her. I knew all about this crazy idea she had been building up for so long since Britt had gone to Australia. I knew how much the things she had been saying to me had been driving me crazy. And I also knew that she would definitely say something of a similar nature to Brittany unless I got there first. This coffee date had trouble written all over it.

"Yeah, yeah I do know Vic," I said to Britt as I hopped off of the counter I had been sitting on. "I'm gonna go to the washroom."

Brittany almost reluctantly and confusedly said 'okay' and I left her standing at the kitchen counter.

It wasn't hard to locate Victoria in amongst the rest of the party. In fact, I had been hearing laughter belonging to her the entire time I had been stood talking with Brittany in the kitchen.