Cloud Castle

25. Damaged beyond repair

All I can hear was the clock ticking inside this closed four walls. Nakakainis kasi sila Riel at Ate Leigh. They just decided they want to dance, kaya ang ending edi dadalawa lang kami ni Bellamy dito.

My heart was beating erratically that I'm afraid he might hear it. 

"What are you doing here Bellamy, really?"

"Come on, I'll get you home... You're already drunk..."

I tap his hand off of me. I shook my head. "Not drunk yet, I can go home alone..."

"Why do you hate me?"

"I... I d-don't... I just hate your idea that you're in love with me. You have no freaking idea of what you' talking about..." Diretso kong saad sakanya. I rolled my eyes tska nilagok yung pang anim na bote. Hays... 

The more I get drunk the more it becomes clear... Clear as crystal clear... I know...

''I am in--''

That no matter what I do... 

''Alam ko... Ilang beses mo nang sinabi sa akin iyan... But what if... What if you didn't saw me that time?'' 

''Maybe we're still meant to meet... Diba nga kami yung kinuha niyong next cover sa magazine niyo...''

He already won my heart... in a heartbeat wheter I want it or not. Seeing him, knowing he was in a relationship with another girl... Being with Clark and not be happy about it. He changed everything, every little thing I've ever believed in. The one thing I promised myself I'd never be. Akala ko ba nag momove on pa ako kay Clark? What happen now? 

I shook my head. This is just a spur of the moment... Maybe I feel like I fall for him because he's the only guy who made me feel loved. Maybe that's just it is... Yeah... Convince yourself Celestine. 

''Just leave... Bellamy, please... Iba na lang, huwag na lang ako...'' Nung naramdaman kong may pumatak na luha sa pisnge ko pinunasan ko kaagad. He shouldn't know... Why do you have to fall again? Ngayon talaga? 

''Grabe... Grabe ka na... How many ways do you have to rip my heart out?'' After he said that he stormed out of the room. I was left dumbfounded. I wanted this anyway but... Masakit pala... Ang tanga mo kasi iyan tuloy. 

I stared at the empty door for minutes bago ko nakitang pumasok ulit sila Riel at Ate Leigh. Ang saya pa nila pero nawala yung ngiti nila nung nakita nila ako. Omygad. I really am good at disappointing people around me. What's wrong with me?

"Bebe girl, ayos ka lang ba? Bakit ka umiiyak?" Concern na tanong ni Ate Riel.

"He left..." I shrug but deep inside my heart's aching deep inside I was cursing and blaming myslef for being a coward. Not because I failed once it doesn't mean it will happen again. Walang lovestory na magkapareho.

Bellamy did nothing but to make me smile and the Sia issue wasn't his fault anyway. It was what people thinks.

"Bakit be?"

I shrugged and stand up. "I'm a hopeless case and I guess now he realized that..."

Ate Leigh and Riel decided to go home while I decided to call Luke. I look up at the time and it's already past 12 but I still called his phone.

Nauna na kasing umuwi mga kasama ko, I told them someone was fetching me but I wasn't sure if he will and if he's not busy. Si Dylan kasi nag out of town while Izzy was being Izzy and decided to still be stupid and attended the love of his life's baby's christening day.