Ocean of Thoughts

The Man

The man who ruined me. The man who almost killed someone. Who tried to murderer his mom. Who got two other people thrown in prison for his actions. That man whom I know. And used to think was a good man. Who I looked up to. What I thought a man was supposed to do. Have 6 different women every week. Kiss all of them too. I thought that was okay. To have more than one boyfriend. I thought it was okay to ask someone to marry you, then go kiss someone else. I thought that it was completely and utterly okay to go to random men's houses, while my dad left. I thought it was okay that he had to walk the line on the road, even though he stumbled. He had a hip problem right? That's what he told me. When he was drunk, he drove. And only then had a hip problem. I thought it was okay to steal money, because you wanted to. I thought it was okay to go days without eating. Because that's what he made me do. Steal, Starve, and that's not even half of it.

I am the daughter of a Drinking, Smoking, Meth Making, Abusive, Murderer. That man is my father. The one who did all those things. But most of all. He's a liar. He told me that he had to punch my brother because he was being bad. But he was only sleeping. So I was confused. But Fathers don't lie. Right?
Wrong.

He's part of my past. The end. He will never become part of my life again. Ever.