Ocean of Thoughts

Mental Breakdowns

Okay
Bout these mental breakdowns. They are more and more frequently and I can't stop them.

No I'm not going to stop writing. Because I feel like writing is the safest way to cope with this. That or bloody knuckles.

Anger is a main issue. I don't have patience. If you don't do what I say after I've said it two times I'm over with it. I'm bout ready to burst.

I've always had problem with anger. A kid moved in with us for a bit. Two years. (She was a couple months older than me.) And she used to take my clothes and wear my jeans. When my parents went and bought her two pair. Yes two. From buckle. Like fr. Wear yours. Mine are legit all I have. So I started wearing skinny jeans. Mind you I was the only one with skinny jeans.

But the very next day. You wouldn't guess who took my pants. She took them. Of course. Then lied about it. And hid them in the back of my closet. Like come on! So I found them and I screamed at her. I was pushed her to the ground and got on top of her. Bout to beat the crap out of her. My mom pulled me off thankfully.

One day she kept pushing my buttons. And i charged her. She dodged slightly. I was on the floor at this point. She was smirking. I was so angry at that point that I was becoming weak. Because my muscles were straining. They weren't meant to do that. She straddled me and pushed her nails into my veins on my wrists. It hurt. Freaking bad. I had scars. But they healed up.

Main point here. I'm not so mentally stable.