The Bad Ones

Jamie

Imperfections of a teen idle

All I could think about was his face and his the fear in his words. They kept swimming through my mind making me want to scream. I quickly backed out of the plan I had originally came up with in my head when I walked through the doors of Tommy's bedroom. I had no idea why I came to Tommy in the first place. It was the wrong choice. I couldn't explain the truth behind my crying eyes without making him hate me. The truth was almost too much for anyone to bare. Too much for me to bare. So I lied. It nothing to do with Romane. Romane had no idea what was going on. He didn't know about Tommy and I. He didn't know it was over between the two of us.

"Jamie? Jamie?" The voice said my name over and over again trying to wake me up.

I quickly sat up and looked at the person that was calling my name repeatedly. Romane stood in front of my desk with his arms crossed and his eyes were filled with amusement as he stared at me with raised eyebrows. I looked around the room and noticed not a single person was in here.

Shit. I was alone with him.

"What time is it?" I ask stretching my arms.

"Well class just ended so take a guess."

"Fuck." I mutter.

"Sleeping in my class is not allowed just because we are together." He tells me grinning as he leans against his desk.

"Then why are we together?" I joke groggily wiping away the tiredness from my eyes.

"Because I love you." He beams with smile on his face. I feel my stomach churn when he starts walking towards the desk I was sat in.

"That's great and stuff." I reply awkwardly as I play with my fingers trying to think of how I was going to say what I needed to say without hurting him.

"Are you okay?" He asks sitting in the desk beside me.

"No." I answer truthfully.

"Why? What's wrong? Are you okay?" He begins rattling off question after question making me want to pull my hair.

"Look...we need to talk." I finally decided that was the way I wanted to start this conversation, with a cliché break up line. Maybe he would take a hint.

Worry immediately begin to take over his face and he frowned at her words. "What's going on, Jamie?" He sounded so innocent that it made her guilt even stronger.

"We can't do this." I simply say trying to look everywhere but into his eyes.

"W-what do you mean?" He stutters looking at her with pleading eyes.

"I mean that you and I are over." It didn't hurt me. When I said those words, I felt relief. If I really did love him then wouldn't I feel something more?

"Is this because I won't quit? I swear I'll do it tomorrow morning! I'll go straight to Lemony tomorrow and tell him I don't want to finish the next two weeks. I'll do it just for you. Please just don't do this to me. I can't do this without you. I can be here and I just...I...Please...I ne-"

"Romane." I whisper softly interrupting his frantic ramble.

"I just c-cant..." He stumbled over his words before I noticed a stream of years sliding down his cheek.

My eyes widen when I see them. I fucking broken. What if it happens again? What if I fuck up again? My stomach dropped at my thoughts and my head ached forcing me to massage my temples.

I won't let this happen again. I won't let this happen again. I won't let this happen again.

I repeated those word over and over again until I believed them myself.

Something woke in me when I realized this could. I can't stop him. I don't have control once I walk out of that door. I have learned that once and I don't need to experience it again.

So I grabbed Romane's face in both of my hands and I lean in putting my forehead against his.

"You will be fine. I swear to God. You will be fine. You are going to fine someone better than me. Someone not so fucked up. You will forever thank me for this. You are a great man and I don't deserve you. You deserve love and that is something I can't give you. I know I told you I loved you but I thought I did. I didn't know what it was, Romane. I'm screwed up like that. I'm just not enough and you are. You are enough for every single girl out there."

I wiped away tear after tear until there was nothing left. Until he was completely dried out.

I continued on when he looked at me asking if there was anything more I head to say. "I won't use the cliché 'it's not you, Its me' line but that is true. It is me. I can't be the girl you are looking for especially when my heart is with someone else."

The last part turned his sad expression into something almost demonic. He looked angry now less sad. All of his tears washed away. He smacked my hands away and sat straight. He faced me looking deep into my eyes. It was almost like he was searching for something. Something like a lie.

"Are you telling me you're breaking my fucking heart over another guy?" He spits angrily standing up.

"I-it was before us. I was j-just..." I couldn't find the right words.

"You are a bitch, Jamie. A fucking bitch." He shouts slamming his hands down on the desk lowly making me jump before storming out of the classroom before I could reply. Before I could beg for him to understand.

The truth was no one would understand. There was only one person who would truly get it.

From: Tommy boy

Meet me at the library after school.

Speak of the devil.

To: Tommy boy

Okay.

After everything that just happened only he could put a smile on my face.

Authors note:

So this is da story...nothing else to say but keep being awesome sauce with a side of chicken nuggets.

Song is of course....

Hawaiian party - cub sport

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