Elements (Pentatonix)

Chapter 16

Sarah's POV

I wanted nothing more than to forget. Forget about everything that's happened in my life. But as hard as I tried, I couldn't get the thunderous crack of the gunshot that echoed throughout the arena out of my ears. I couldn't help but see the color red everywhere I looked, even though I was surrounded by nothing but white. There wasn't any time to care about changing out of my skating dress, or even my skates, so it was natural that I was getting weird stares from people that shifted their gazes between me, my bare feet only covered by stockings, and my skates that rested beside me.

My phone shook violently in my hand as I clutched it tightly, tears pouring from my eyes, each drop landing on a different spot of my legs or my dress each time they fell. I never really had a problem with hospitals, but after Nathan's death, I couldn't stand them. I was reliving Nathan all over again.

I probably should have tried to get some sleep, especially with it being so late, but I couldn't. The others were, even Esther, but they weren't there. I couldn't even hardly blink without a vivid image of Avi's limp body dropping to the floor, so there was no way in hell I could sleep. So I just sat in the silent room crying. It was possibly the worst kind of crying there was. The silent one. Everyone was asleep, and I didn't want to wake them up. My throat was on fire and my eyes burned with unshed tears, even though they began getting blurry and the tears began falling once again. I wanted to scream, but I couldn't, so I wrapped my arms around my waist tightly and held my breath until I couldn't help but let out a quiet yelp. As much as I hated it, I couldn't quit thinking about the fact that the one person I cared about the most might not make it.

Sure there was Kevin, and it was a hard decision to make about whether to call him or the EMT's, but I figured the ambulance could get him help faster. On the way to the hospital, I had called Esther first to let her know, but I called Kevin immediately after to see if he could help. Even though he tried, he had said that because the bullet was still lodged in him, he didn't want to take a chance, especially with it being so close to his heart. He told me that after the bullet was out, then he could heal him easily, so we were stuck waiting for him to get out of surgery. I hated it.

"You ready to tell me what happened?"

I jumped at the sound of Esther's voice as she sat up in her seat next to me. It was clear she would be crying if she could, but she was all cried out. "I-I don't know," I stuttered, trying to keep my composure. "I was training and he showed up. We got into a stupid argument," I paused, trying to figure out whether or not to tell her about the kiss. I wasn't sure how she would react, but I did know that she needed to know everything. "I kissed him and then he pushed me back right before he got shot. I don't know who did it or why," I admitted quietly, my gaze dropping to my lap as I felt the tears start coming on again.

She wrapped an arm around my shoulder and gently forced my head onto her shoulder. "Try to get some rest. You need it," she said quietly, and I could tell she was trying not to cry. She did have a point. I needed it. We had been here for hours, and it was going on four in the morning.

"I can't. Every time I try to, I relive it all over again. It's like everyone I get close to gets hurt," I said quietly, bringing the back of my hand to my cheeks and wiping away the tears.

"It's not your fault," she said. "The only person to blame is the person that did it."

I knew she was trying to comfort me, but it wasn't really working.

"Family and friends of Avriel Kaplan?"

Esther immediately stood up and walked over to the doctor, a worried expression on her face.

"He's a very lucky boy. Just a half an inch more and it would have punctured his heart. The good news is that it didn't, and he'll be just fine," he said with a genuine smile. I saw Esther visibly relax, and I couldn't help but think what she would do if he hadn't made it.

He walked away, and she returned to the seat next to me just as I went to stand up. "When he wakes up, make sure he knows it's probably best to keep his distance from me. In fact that's all of you. The last thing I want to happen is someone else get hurt because of me," I said, gathering up my skates and starting to make my way out of the waiting room.

"You can't be serious. My brother gets shot and you're just gonna abandon him?"

"He got shot because of me, Esther. Everyone I care about gets hurt. I don't want it to happen again," I told her, not bothering to turn around.

"We're all your friends, Sarah. We're here for you, and as weird as it is for me to say, Avi really cares about you."

I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling my phone vibrate in my hand. I took a deep breath as I read the message and locked the screen as I looked up for a brief moment. "That's exactly why he has to stay away from me." I walked out without another word, quickly finding my mom's car and climbing into the passenger seat.

"How is he?" she asked, concern lacing her voice as she pulled off.

"He'll live," I mumbled, putting my seatbelt on and staring out the window.

"You don't seem too happy about it."

"Because when he wakes up, and Esther tells him what I told her to tell him, I get the feeling he's just gonna be hurt all over again," I admitted, feeling a single tear roll down my cheek.

A/N: Sorry not sorry... XD

~*~*~Ash~*~*~