Oblivious

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*Mal sat with their two newborns, one in her arms, the other she watched through the clear glass of the incubator, it hurt her to see her little girl like this but she knew she was lucky, it could've been much worse, it all still felt like a daze, she had expected to just wake up at any moment, but she never did, Ben soon returned and smiled when he found her looking at their children with the same love he knew she'd always wanted to give them, she looked so happy with them, motherhood suited her well, he watched on secretly from the doorway, she didn't speak but the soft smile and the happiness in her eyes told him enough, their son made a slightly strange noise and Mal looked at him with furrowed eyebrows, that was when she looked up and the smile returned to her face*
Mal: hey, is it sorted?
Ben: yeah, all the stuff done, birth certificates are sorted out, we're all done, you and he can leave here and rest in living quarters of the castle instead
Mal: but not her
Ben: not yet, but soon, they're optimistic
Mal: I don't wanna go just yet
Ben: we can stay with her as long as you like, we can come back as much as we like while she's here, just remember you need your rest too, you've been through a lot
Mal: we both have
Ben: I haven't, this was all you sweetheart
Mal: I didn't really see it before, but now I've had the chance to take a step back I realise, I was completely oblivious to how you were feeling, they're you're kids too, this affected you too, but I couldn't get out of my own godforsaken head long enough to see that, all those days where I was yelling or screaming or crying at you, when I wouldn't leave something alone, when I started a fight just so I could not think about it....just so I could be mad at you instead of myself....
*the last part had only just clicked as she was talking, she thought she'd finally understood everything before she started talking but now she knew she hadn't*
Ben: I'm fine Mal, I was always fine
Mal: I resented myself so much that I wanted you to resent me too, I threw all that abuse at you because I couldn't cope....how did you cope? Not with them, but with what I did? I was awful to you, I screamed at you continuously, I yelled at you most days, I spent most of the time crying in between, but you were my rock, how were you so able to be my rock?
Ben: you did nothing wrong Mal, not a single thing, I'm completely fine, you did nothing
Mal: I was awful to you how can you be so okay with that?
Ben: you were not awful to me, don't ever think otherwise
Mal: how don't you hate me?
Ben: because you did nothing wrong
Mal: I'm surprised you didn't think I blamed you or something, I was acting like it
Ben: no one could've bought that babe because every second of the day you were blaming yourself
Mal: how did you feel?
Ben: what do you mean?
Mal: I never even bothered to ask how you were feeling about it, my magic might have been the reason that you lost your child, how didn't that make you blame me? How could you still sit and take everything I threw at you? Knowing it was my own body doing this anyway
Ben: only you blamed you for that Mal, never a second did I think that, you couldn't help it
Mal: you never talked to me about how you felt
Ben: why are we talking about this now? It's all over, it's in the past
Mal: I just wanna know
Ben: there's nothing to tell
Mal: please, i just want to know
Ben: it hurt, it really sucked to think that all that joy might be twisted into the most unimaginable pain, but what really hurt was how much it hurt you, I caused that, watching you go through that killed me, I never blamed you, I blamed myself if anyone, I couldn't do more for you, I couldn't help you, I couldn't fix it, I just had to watch you battle on against your own body, helpless, the thought of losing my child was soul destroying, but what really broke me was the thought of what it was doing to you, and by extension, loosing you as well, either physically to all this or mentally to the point where our relationship broke down and we fell apart, l didn't know what I'd do if you weren't you anymore
Mal: I don't know what to say
Ben: you don't need to say anything
Mal: how did you manage to handle all this? I just fell apart
Ben: keeping you going kept me going, what you needed was that and if I could help you do what you needed to do to get through it and keep going then that was good enough for me
Mal: I don't get that
Ben: being what you needed was what I needed I guess
Mal: this is all so crazy
Ben: yeah
Mal: I don't wanna leave her
Ben: we'll stay for a little while longer then
Mal: no I just don't want to leave her
Ben: we'll see what happens
*they kiss gently but are suddenly interrupted by Ben's phone going off, they pull away and he pulls out his phone*
Ben: I'm so sorry, I thought I'd turned it off
*Mal looks to see if their daughter was woken up and finds her still sleeping peacefully, when she's sure both twins are still fast asleep she sighs with relief*
Mal: it's fine
Ben: sorry I've gotta take this
*she nods as he answers the phone and steps away
Ben: yeah, uh huh, shit okay, yeah, okay, thanks
*he hangs up and turns to Mal who sighs as she sees the look on his face*
Mal: what now?
Ben: the people have caught wind of the royal birth
Mal: crap

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Almost time to give you the names, just gonna beat around the bush a little more first 😂😂 xoxo

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