Listen to the song while reading!!
«warning: self-harm»
Yes I'm aware this should be in Josh POV but I wanted it in Tyler's
💛Tyler💛
Tyler sat on the park bench, staring at the now dark ground.
It was late at night now, midnight to be exact.What are you gonna do now Ty? You're homeless now and Josh isn't going to care enough to take you in.
He'll take me in.
No. He sees that broken and ugly loser that hides behind that mask of your disguise.
S-stop...
Why should I? Everything I say is true.
N-no it's n-n-not.
Yes it is you idiot. He doesn't love you.
Tyler shut his eyes tightly and shook his head. He opened them again and stared at the ground, tears starting to fill his eyes. Tyler cried as quietly as he could, scratching at his face. He screamed out in pain when he managed to cut his face. At last, he rose to his feet grabbed his stuff and ran down the street still crying.
He loves me.
He doesn't.
He loves me.
He loves me.Tyler stopped and fell to the ground.
He doesn't love me.
Tyler screamed and curled into a tight ball on the cold concrete. The cold began to seep through his body, making him shiver even more.
"J-Josh...l-l-loves...m-m-me..." Tyler hesitated and sobbed more. "N-no...He...d-d-doesn't...."
Tyler cried even more as he whispered this to himself. He lifted his arms and began to scratch at the bandages wrapping his wrists. Tearing the bandages off, his wrists started bleeding lightly.
"Stop making me suffer!" Tyler screamed into the night air, a sense of panic overwhelming him. "Is anyone even out there?"
Tyler said feebly.
No answer.
Tyler lifted his head but dropped it back down quickly. "No one is out there...I'm alone.."
Tyler lay there, crying his eyes out. The worst kind of pain overwhelming him, the worst kind of hurt. Tyler shook his head and forced himself to his feet weakly, walking in the same direction. Tyler looked up at the dark, cloud covered sky. It was gray. Just like everything else. Everything around him seemed to be collapsing, crashing into nothingness and disappearing before he could catch it.
Tyler shook his head angrily and kept walking, tearing off the bandages on his wrists. Soon, Tyler arrived at his favorite place in the entire world. The place Josh had taken him one day.
Tyler stepped inside the small ice cream shop and sat at a table.
"Hello!" Tyler looked up whena lady spoke to him in a small voice.
"Oh....uhm hi." Tyler said awkwardly giving the lady a small smile.
"What can I get you sir?" She asked, smiling brightly.
"Oh uhm... Can I have the chocolate peanut butter ice cream please? In a tub if you can."
She nods and starts to scoop the ice cream into a small tub. Tyler got to his feet, pulling a five dollar bill out of his pocket.
She handed him the tub and smiled. "Don't worry about it. It's on the house."
"Thanks." Tyler smiled, grabbed the the tub, and sat down at his table. Tyler began to eat the ice cream, but stopped.
The ice cream parlor.
The ice cream he was eating.
It was all Josh's favorite.
Tyler shook his head again, forcing the memories from his skull.
Josh doesn't truly love you remember? Tyler thought bleakly, remembering what Message said to him. Josh is just using you like always.
Tyler stared into the ice cream, fighting back with everything to keep the tears in his eyes, fighting to push the thoughts away.
It's not true, Josh does love me, he loves me, he wouldn't lie to me. Tyler thought and started eating the ice cream again. But what if it is true?
Tyler shook his head again and ate more of the ice cream. He finished a few seconds later and stood up, dropping his bucket and spoon into the trash as he walked out.
I should go to Josh's house. He might be up. Tyler thought. He'll probably tell me to go home or something.
Tyler sighed and began to make his way to Josh's house, walking slowly because of how tired he was. Tyler decided to pull out his phone and was suprised to see 4 texts from his mom.
Tyler please come back.
Tyler I'm sorry. You know I love you.
Tyler, stop ignoring me. Stop acting like I don't exist.
Tyler I can't believe you did this. Over those tiny things. Guess I should just give up. Have a nice fucking life.
Tyler sighed angrily and shoved his phone into his pocket. Tyler soon arrived at Josh's house and walked up to his door, hesitantly knocking on the door.
A sleepy looking Josh answered the door. "Tyler...? What are you doing here?"
"Its a long story." Tyler scratched the back of his neck. "Can I come in? I'll explain inside."
Josh nodded hesitantly. "Sure."
Tyler stepped inside the large house and sat down on the black couch they owned. Josh closed the door and sat next to him. "So can I have that explanation now?"
Tyler nodded. "Yeah. Well when you dropped me off at home, my mom was there. She asked why my wrists were bandage and I told her everything. About how I cut. About how I've tried to commit suicide. About how I'm gay. About us. Everything. Then I told her I thought she would hate me. She said she couldn't hate me and I lost it. I screamed, I yelled, I cried. I told her how much I hated her, I packed a bag and got out of there."
Josh nodded. "Well at least you can get away from them."
"True." Tyler agreed looking down at the tattered bandages.
Josh sighed and looked over at Tyler. "I did something stupid."
"What did you do?" Tyler asked, looking over at him curiously.
Josh closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I told my parents I was gay...and..."
Tyler gripped Josh's hand. "Its okay. You can say it."
"...I told them you're gay too." Josh almost whispered.
Tyler froze. "You what?"
Josh pulled his hand away. "I t-told th-them we were together..."
Tyler got to his feet. "Josh...why the fuck would you do that? You know I didn't want anyone to know!"
"Tyler I know I'm s-" Tyler cut him off.
"Lemme guess you're sorry right? Everyone's fucking sorry! Message was right all this fucking time." Tyler hissed.
Josh got up and pulled Tyler into a hug. "Tyler stop-"
"No! I'm fucking done with all the lies and fake love." Tyler hissed and pushed Josh away.
"Tyler! Please!" Josh yelled but it was too late, Tyler was already out the door.
💛💛💛
YAY I ACTUALLY FINISHED IT!
Writers block is a bitch.
I'm happy with the way this fic is so far, hope you guys like it too!
Thanks for reading this story, it makes me so happy to know that people are taking time out of their days to read my writing :)
See ya loves!
💛~TylerDun💛
YOU ARE READING
Message Man-«{Joshler}» HIATUS
Fanfiction"Josh, you don't know my heart the way you know my face." "I will soon. I'll find who you are soon enough." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Credit to Kinley on the Clique Amino App for the cover! 💛💛💛