Tainted

Chapter 16

Chapter 16

After about an hour, I said good bye to Lauren and headed up to the fitness suite. As I peered in the door, Dan was sat on a bench, biting his nails, his face tense and worried.

"Woah, what's up with you?" I asked sarcastically. His head snapped up and he abruptly stood, his face distorting into anger and hurt.

"Where were you?" he shouted, running his hands through his hair.

"With Lauren. I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were expecting me here at that exact time." I said quietly but still held an irritated tone, scared of how angry he was.

"I was worried sick! I called you, left voicemails, I looked everywhere for you. Why didn't you think to come back, or let me know or something?!" he shouted, tears building up in his eyes.

"I can't lose you." He whispered, while sitting down on a bench. I walked over and sat next to him, rubbing his back, still confused.

"Your not going to lose me Dan." I said quietly. It was like I was comforting a child.

"Yes I will. Just like I lost everyone else." He sobbed. I never found out what happened to his parents; I'd never had the heart to ask. I guess I was scared of the answer, of his reaction.

He knew almost everything about me, yet I barely knew anything about him, or his past. I'd never felt so selfish in my whole life.

"What do you mean?" I asked quietly.

"My mum died when I was 5. My sister committed suicide when I was 8. My dad got killed when I was 9. One of my only best mates went missing last year. Everyone I love, I lose. It's inevitable. Your all I have left Maisie." He whispered the last part, tilting his head to look right into my eyes. He looked so broken, my heart ached at the sight.

"I'm not going anywhere." I said and hugged him. I sat on his lap, my legs off the side. We must've been sat there for over five minutes, but it was nice. We were so comfortable in each others company now, and in that moment, nothing else mattered. I still couldn't get to grips with how he had just opened up to me. He was such a reserved person, I never expected anything like that.

We trained for the remaining hours, not really intense, but just jogging on the treadmills and joking about. It was really nice to go back to how we were, yet I couldn't shake off what he said before. He had had such a troubled childhood, it wasn't fair. He didn't deserve it.

We headed back to my room, and ordered food. Once it arrived, we sat and ate in silence. Not awkward but.. comfortable.

He spoke suddenly.

"When I was 15, I got in with a bad crowd. I became addicted to um.. drugs. I was a mess, and one night me and my 'mates'," he held up his fingers, mocking speech marks as he said it. "we met another gang, and we had a fight. It went really wrong, really quickly, and um.." He looked up at me and licked his lips, his eyes empty and sad.

"Two from the other gang died that night. And it was my fault." He said quietly. I gasped softly, my hand over my mouth, my head reeling. He was involved in.. murders? It just didn't seem right. I couldn't imagine him doing anything like that.

"I thought you were with the agency before then?" I asked.

"I left for two years, and then came back. They only let me back in, once a psychiatric doctor gave me the all-clear." He chuckled, it lacked soul, and humour.

"I had to be supervised for a whole year. Somebody constantly watching me." He shook his head sadly.

"I had no freedom. It was like I was some sort of monster. Well, I guess i am. Everyone was scared of me." He laughed to himself again. "They still are." He added quietly.

"They don't know the real you." I said angrily, annoyed at how they could judge him over one mistake, even if it was a pretty big one.

"Now you know my story. Well, most of it. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I don't trust easily." He explained, his voice worried and sad.

"Me neither." I agreed.

We finished our food and then began to watch some film, yet I didn't pay attention.

My head was still swarming when I fell asleep in his arms.

Even though he had done bad things, I knew he was a good person, now anyway. I would try and make him see that, because he didn't deserve the loneliness and grief he had gone through.

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I'm doing a full edit of the whole story so far (I'm on chapter 26 now btw, this is from the future) and I never meant him to spill so much in this chapter but I can't change it now because hundreds of people have already seen it ffs