The trip to Nashville (Keith Urban)

Letter #1

It was time to head home and we all walked out to the car and hopped in I bucked up the girls and keith was in the passenger seat with my black box on his lap I turned the car on and all of the sudden Keith's song "good thing" started blasting out the speakers we all jumped from being startled

I accidentally yelled, "ow shit"

Keith was looking at me strangely and said, "firstly try to refrain from the cussing secondly I was unaware I had my CD in my car"

I blushed so dam hard and said, "yes sir I'm sorry and you don't I put it in"

He chuckled and said, "and you just carry around the CD everywhere you go?"

I said, "uh yah I carry all of your CD's everywhere I go how could I not...."

I could tell that surprised him a bit I then said, "alright girls before we go I wanna teach you my special Disney hand shake"

The hand shake basically consisted of a bunch of different hand shakes that have been in different Disney movies to which the girls didn't recognise the part from finding nemo I was shocked when I explained it and they hadn't even seen the movie I then said, "oh you pore deprived children you haven't lived your childhood correctly if you haven't seen finding nemo"

I then remembered that my family has a portable DVD player so said, "ill be right back" I ran into the house and got it along with all the movies including finding nemo I set it up so they could watch it with headphones so me and keith could talk and we headed out on the road

I then said, "keith um I'm going to worn you there is some pretty crazy things in those letters that im not sure you want to know about how I feel about you"

He said, "are you kidding katie I love your letter so much this box is like heaven for me I wanted to read more but now I can"

I said, "no your not understanding there is some pretty embarrassing things in there that I wrote when I was young and when I think about it now I feel kinda ashamed basically secrets that have never been told but now they will be told so now I'm older and more mature the things that we're said are very bad"

He said, "katie I understand what your saying and I won't judge I'm kinda excited because I get a little glimpse of you when you were younger how old were you when you started these?"

I replied, "I was 16 now I'm 21"

He chuckled and said, "ok this will be cool alright let's get started letter #1

"Hi Keith my name it Katie Hansen in this letter series I will write about the challenges and things that I go through in my life and how you and your music have helped and inspired me so much wether or not these letters will ever be read by you I guess I'll never know but I sure hope they do because I just want you to know I think your the best"

"So I guess I should start from the beginning a year ago I saw you on American idol when my mom was watching it something about you was just pulling me to you I felt like I just needed to know about you"

"I asked my mom who you were and she said a country music artist and your name is Keith Urban so I immediately went to my room to research you I went straight a biography about you it was like an hour long I watched and loved every moment of it and surprisingly retained ALL of it when it got to the part of it where it talked about your past addiction I immediately knew why god drew me to you I at the time was an addict myself I didn't like that part of me and wasn't sure how to stop"

"I turned to you and looked up to you I wanted to be where you were at in life in fact so much so I was willing to do anything to get it I wanted so badly to be able to be proud enough to tell people that yes I did do this but not anymore it was such a difficult thing I went through and I went through it alone no one to talk to about it that could get me medical help like therapy but in a way you being so open about it and bringing it to attention that it can happen to anyone was kinda my therapy in a way I would listen to your song 'your not my god' whenever I felt like doing it and your song would remind me what I'm really doing I felt so lost and you and your music helped me feel found"

"I know talking about your addiction is a hard thing but to do it in front of millions I can't imagine what that would be like but thank you because I wouldn't be where I am now without you being so open one of the things that you said that will stick with me is...."

Keith then read the words, "no one can make you change and until you can decide for yourself you want to let it go of your addiction you never will and how until you tried the road less traveled you didn't get better"

As keith read that I said it with him he looked at me very strange and said, "you really memorised that?"

Sighed and said, "yes I did and I constantly clinging to those words like a life line I'd tell myself oh well maybe I could just cut it out little by little but then I'd remember those words you'd said and I'd be like stop katie you know your lying to yourself and you've tried that many times and wasn't successful and I'd listen to your music or do anything other than my addiction at times It would drive me crazy"

Keith said, "what was your addiction?"

I was shocked when he straight up asked me that and didn't want to tell him but something happened and before I knew it my lips were moving and I told him almost as if I wasn't in control of my own body

He said, "oh I see"

I sighed and said, "yah I know it's not drugs or things that could kill me but it was something that was controlling my life and I'm sure with my heart condition it possibly could have and I'm still training my brain and body to not see the world as a sexual abject but I'm so much better I used to see any girl or guy and get really hyped up on sexual hormones it was a problem but I don't feel like that anymore because I've trained myself but when I'm around you I feel less in control and I admit I kinda like that I like that I can let you control the situations"