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Hide and Don't Seek

"I'm telling you, the two of you care for each other you're just both too damn stubborn to admit to it. I can't exactly tell how far your feelings go for one another, but I know it's more than just you tolerating him and him liking you." Yuki said from the kitchen of her apartment. I sighed for probably the millionth time. I was tired of hearing those dreaded words. I didn't want to care for him. "I know it's not what you want to hear but, it's so obvious."

"I'm pretty damn sure he hates me." I state matter of factly. Anyone could see that, right? 

"No, he does not. I know when he hates someone and he does not hate you under any circumstances." she said to me and I rolled my eyes. She kept saying pointless things such as that but it wasn't what I wanted to hear. 

"Then what exactly do you consider to be hatred? Honestly if this is his way of liking someone then I really would hate to see how he acts towards someone he actually does hate." I say to her as I lean on her counter. I came to her for help, not for her to play with me as well.

"Yes, you would hate to see that because it is bloody. He will do anything in his power to destroy them, whether it be killing them or simply degrading them. It doesn't matter to him because it takes a lot to make Kaname hate a person, so he will do a lot to make sure they can't do anything to him." she tells me. She swallows and I can tell she really wants to say something.

"Spit it out." 

"Ugh, you read me like a damn book. I just, I really want you two to get along? I don't know, at first it was strange to me to know that my best friend was going to be marrying the man that was like a brother to me. I didn't know how to feel about it, but over the last couple of weeks with you being so busy and not really being able to spend time with Kaname, I've been able to see just how much you affect him and his mental state." Yuki explains with a soft expression.

"So you're implying that I make him mental?" I ask, seeming as that was what she was getting at. Her eyes widened and she blushed a bit, flustered by not being able to explain correctly.

"No! That isn't at all what I meant. I was meaning that you mean something to him, all be it I don't know what, and it does something to him when he is not able to be around you. If it hadn't been for you being gone for so long, he would have never taken off on that little trip for you two. Yeah, he played it off as being a trip to check on one of his branches but we all know that he just wanted to be alone with you for some time." she winked at me.

"Yeah, that is probably the most laughable thing you've said so far. He doesn't give more than a damn about me, and I'm fine with that because I feel the same way." I defended, with a dismissive hand. She continued to smile softly at me.

"Do you, Zero? Do you really feel the same? I do feel as if you are telling a minor fib on that one." she points out and I groan loudly, making her giggle. Who was I kidding? It bothered me beyond belief to know that there was a possibility that he couldn't care about me in any way. "So it does bother you." Yuki stated as if it weren't already obvious.

"I don't know what's wrong with me. Every time I'm around him it's something different. I hate him, and we fight a lot but it never puts me in a bad mood because I know we never really mean any of it. I used to think it was because we were too different to exist in harmony, but rather it is that we are too alike."

I wonder whose brilliant mind would have said that." she poked her tongue out in a playful manner. I rolled my eyes at her but I didn't mean anything by it. "Where is he, anyway?"

"He was playing hide and seek with some of the city kids, said it would be good for the family to have the heir being good to kids." I informed and she nodded, not saying anything after that. I sat there, thinking about how I would love to be able to hide and never be seeked. I wanted to play that game for the rest of my life, becoming the champion of it even, because they could never find me. I'd do anything to do that as long as I could be free.

I didn't want to be king, I didn't want to marry some royal brat, and I didn't want to make someone bare my kids in order to have another heir to the thrown. It blew my mind that they would put their child through something such as this without second thought. Hey, let's put our most beloved thing up for grabs by the first vampire that is deemed respectable and let him fuck our child and allow him to impregnate the boy as well! What wonderful parenting that must seem to be. 

Kaname never asked for this either, I'm sure. He didn't want to be king or queen or prince or anything of the sort. He wanted to own a successful business and be known for his ability to do so, not known for his bloodline and who he was supposed to be. It was quite humorous to call it a bloodline if you asked me, but in reality, who ever did ask me what I thought? 

~

Ichiru watched as I climbed the tallest tree in the whole town to retrieve his homemade airplane. It wasn't paper, but it was nearly as light as that. I had been good at making things such as that along with everything else it seemed. I wouldn't have done it for anyone else other than my brother that was already starting to sniffle in the weather outside although it wasn't that cold any longer. It was still closing in on the colder months but it was in that time where it would snow and then a few days later it would be warm enough to go outside and play in the parks. 

He smiled at me as I jumped down from the tree with the small plane in hand. He took it and threw his arms around my neck which made me fill with warmth even though I could tell his body temperature was lower than it should be. I hardly had the heart to tell him he should probably head back inside as soon as we arrived home. 

"You'll get sick again if you don't go inside for the night." I told him once we started our way down the sidewalk. The adults that walked past us smiled at us as they always did. They knew of ichiru being sickly, and they also knew how protective I was of him. 

"Zero, is there ever a time in which you think of only yourself rather than I?" he asked me as I pulled him closer to me and allowed my arm to rest around his shoulders. 

"I would never wish to think of myself unless you were part of me." I replied simply, the same as always when someone asked me that question.

"I will always be a part of you, though, you know that. I mean, do you ever think about living rather than saving me?"

"I'll never want to live unless you are surviving." I informed him without looking at him, because I knew how sick he was and I knew that the wrong thing could kill him easily. "Now let's go home so we can play a game where you hide in your bed for a long time before I find you." I told him with an encouraging smile. It was so rare that he was able to go outside that I hated to take it from him so quickly.

"What game is that?" 

"Hide and Don't Seek."