Issues

Time

Alison's POV

I've been waiting in Emily's room for going on 11 hours now. The OR has provided me with updates on a regular basis yet I still feel so disconnected and helpless.

There's practically a track formed in her ICU room floor from the amount of pacing I've been doing. My patience is wearing thin. I'm about to crawl out of skin. I'm exhausted but I can't sleep. She needs me right now and I have to be there for her when she arrives. If she makes it out of this alive of course.

Heavy, familiar footsteps enter the room and grab my attention.

"She's out of surgery and in the recovery room. She'll be here within the hour" Dr. Grayson says with a smile.

I burst out of the chair and smother him with a huge hug and expression of deepest gratitude.

"You're quite welcome Alison. To be honest, I don't know how she survived that. Maybe it was the thought of coming back to you that did the trick" he continues with an even bigger smile.

"Maybe so. Can you give me a breakdown of all of her injuries" I ask curiously.

Taking a deep breath he says, "Emily's pelvis was shattered. We were able to repair that. She has three broken ribs. Those will heal with time. Overall, Emily sustained 8 stab wounds to various parts of her body. One of them punctured her lung. She's on machines to help her heal from that as well. Emily sustained what we believe to be a kick to the head that caused her orbital bone to break. During surgery, her intracranial pressures skyrocketed so we had to place a shunt to relieve the pressure. In the process, we found a brain bleed and luckily we were able to repair that as well. There's a few more things".

"Please Dr. Grayson, just tell me. This can't possibly get much worse" I say desperately.

"Two of the stab wounds were in her lower back, very close to her spinal cord. We don't believe there was any damage to the actual nerves themselves, but the inflammation from them appears to be partially occluding blood flow and is applying pressure to the nerves. Basically, she's currently paralyzed from the waist down. And.... we believe due to the brain bleed, Emily is now in a coma" he says with a concerned look on his face.

"But if there's no damage, then all we have to do is wait for the inflammation to decrease. And she's still showing brain wave activity correct? That may just need time too" I reply trying to process all of her injuries.

"That's true. But lord only knows how long that will take. Could be days, weeks, months, years even. We just don't know" he explains while taking my hand.

"But I know one thing for sure. I've never seen someone survive all of those injuries and that amount of blood loss in my entire career. If she's made it this far, I have no doubt she'll come back to you" he continues as he squeezes my hand with encouragement before he leaves the room.

I remain in place, feeling frozen and completely overwhelmed as I process the extent of her injuries. They're so complex, so severe, and indicate a long road to recovery for Emily. I'm going to be there every step of the way. Now that I know she didn't mean anything she said before, I'm never leaving her side.

Approximately 30 minutes later, three nurses wheel Emily into the room. She's hooked up to so many machines. She so still and so fragile. I can't help my emotions and tears forming at the sight of her.

As soon as they've hooked up every machine and done a quick assessment, I pull up the chair close to her bed. Taking her hand gently, I press it against my cheek and allow my tears to flow as they may.

"Oh Emily.... I'm so so sorry that this happened to you" I say through my tears. "This is all my fault. I don't know if you can still hear me, but I just want you to know that I'm not going home till you wake up and heal from this. You need me right now and I can't bare the thought of being away from you again". Kissing the top of her hand, I continue, "I love you so much Em" before I wipe away my tears and sit back in the chair.

As I nestle myself into a comfortable position, I mentally and physically begin to prepare myself for a long road ahead. Do I continue to work the bare minimum? Do I take a leave of absence? What about Moose? My bills?

Anxiety begins to rise within me as I think about all the angles to this situation.

"Oh my God the girls!" I say suddenly as I quickly sit up in my seat and reach for my phone in my bag.

I send out a group text message saying, "You need to come to the hospital. Something has happened. I can't talk much now. Just come. Room 326".

Within seconds all three respond with panic and various questions.

"Please just come now. It's too much to text" I reply.

Without a word, I turn my attention back to Emily, take her hand, and interlock our fingers together. The gentle, hypnotic beeps, hums, and ticks from the various machines sing their song to me as they keep Emily alive. This is going to be our new reality.

"Alison" asks a soft voice in the doorway.

"Yes" I reply to the young looking nurse standing in the doorway.

"Umm... we have a bit of a problem. Hospital management wants to know how you want to handle it.... the media somehow found out about Emily. They're quickly flooding the outside of the hospital. They're blasting the story all over the television and the internet" she continues fumbling with her fingers. "So... what do you want us to do about it" she asks shyly.

"Oh my God are you serious!? How did they find out?!" I reply while raising my voice at her.

"I'm sorry. I know it's not your fault. You're just the one delivering the message.... um....  tell them to release whatever they think they should tell those vultures. I don't really care. They'll find out one way or another" I reply angrily rolling my eyes.

"Emily is my number one priority right now" I continue as I gaze at her fragile, motionless body.

Not long after the nurse left the room, Hanna, Aria, and Spencer come running into the room.

"Oh my God" they all say in unison before rushing to Emily's bedside.

"What the fuck happened" Hanna asks.

"Who did this to her" Spencer questions.

"What's wrong with her Ali? Tell us everything" Aria insists as she begins to cry.

Soon, they're all crying as they look down at Emily.

"I'm afraid to touch her. I don't want to hurt her" Hanna says sniffling as she gazes down at Emily.

"You can't hurt her Hanna. Just hold her hand. Let her know you're here" I reply gesturing to her hand.

Over the next hour, I explain everything to them. How this happened, who did this, my history with Kate, Emily's current medical status, goals for the furture, and really anything I could think of to say to them. They were all of course in shock and needed a moment to process things before they replied to the horrible news.

"I'll stay in your apartment and take care of Moose until you decide to come home" Aria offers me. "My apartment is being remodeled anyway so this would work out for the both of us. Plus I love Moose" she giggles.

"And of course we will bring you anything you need whenever you need it" Spencer assures me.

"Or if it's 3 am and you just want someone to talk to. We're here for you Alison" Hanna replies.

"We're here for you too" she continues as she gently rubs Emily's hand.

"We love you and we want you to come back to us" Aria interjects as she tucks a strand of hair behind Emily's ear.

"Don't worry Em. We'll take care of Alison. We will handle the press too. Just focus on getting better" Spencer adds.

For the next hour, we mostly just sit in silence as the machines continue their song in the background.

As it started getting darker outside, the girls asked me if I wanted anything.

"I think I'm good for tonight. Grace is bringing me my extra scrubs from my locker. I'm not really hungry either. I'll try tomorrow to eat something" I say as I hug each of them goodbye.

Settling back in the chair, I'm finally alone again with my love.

"Goodnight Emily. I love you" I whisper before I drift off to sleep after far too many hours of being awake.