a little reinvention || tree bros [✔]

Chapter Ten

(WARNINGS: Dissociation episodes. There's also a bit of deadnaming, but it's just Connor trying to make sense of things.)

(To clear up some things: Evan had not told Connor about him being transgender, so this is basically an entire chapter dedicated to telling Connor about it. Zoe was not out to anyone but Evan, Connor, and her girlfriend, Alaina.)

The words hit Connor like a truck, time seeming to stop. A large chill went up his spine as he sat there, vaguely feeling Evan's hand fall from his grasp as he was yanked away. Everything was a blur and nothing felt real. His mind raced at a thousand miles a minute yet not at all. The boy vaguely remembers being put in a car that didn't seem like his parents.

Although his body was awake and there, Connor felt as if he was just watching a movie- disconnected and unaware. He stared ahead at the road, not being able to recall if it was familiar or not. He though there was a hand in his again, but he can't tell. It sounds like someone is speaking to him, but its muffled and sounds like white noise.

He vaguely remembers being brought into a house and he vaguely remembers being helped out of his clothes into some other ones. He doesn't remember falling asleep.

When Connor came to, he felt his muscles ache and burn. He blinked away the exhaustion from his eyes and looked around the room. He immediately recognized it as Evan's, the walls a light blue and little glow in the dark stars glued to the ceiling. He smiled softly and sat up a bit, looking at his clothes. He was wearing somebody's old Nike shirt. He frowned, and as he moved to get out of the bed, the door opened to show a worried Evan. He noticed him sitting up and quickly ran in, practically jumping on Connor and gripping onto him for dear life.

The boy was shaking like a leaf in the wood, about to fall off , and Connor was the tree branch- the only thing that was keeping Evan from falling was him. He shakily wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, nuzzling into his neck and breathing in his scent gently.
'Pine trees.' Connor thought, his eyes closed as he tried to stay calm. Evan pulled away a bit and cupped his cheeks, looking in his eyes.

"Connor, a-are you with me? Y-You were dissociating r-really badly..." Evan's worried tone got quieter and quieter as he spoke, his eyes falling to look down at their connected hands. Connor just nodded.

"Why am I here and not at home?" His voice was distant and tired, his thumb brushing over the palm of his boyfriend's hand in an attempt to comfort him in some way. Evan nibbled his lip.

"Your mom and dad.... they were more upset over the fact of you getting expelled than the fact that we were both outed. They just sent you home with me," He frowned, "They haven't even called my mom and it's been a few hours."

Connor grunted.
"Most likely gonna sue the school. Not for discrimination, but just for kickin' me out." He shook his head and looked at Evan. He was chewing his lip, looking like he wanted to speak. Connor spoke for him.

"So, uh, Christina?"

Evan visibly flinched and he shook his head fast, cursing under his breath as he grabbed the chewy stim and put it in his mouth again. Connor knew immediately not to call him that again. He reached up and cupped his cheek, rubbing a thumb over a newly fallen tear, "Sorry, I've just... Never dealt with something like this before," His voice was soft and caring. He was trying his best to be supportive and understand.

"P-Please just- keep calling me Evan." He looked up at Connor with pleading eyes, tears bubbling up a bit. The taller one nodded gently. Evan nuzzled his hand softly, mumbling, "W-Want me to explain t-this stuff?"

Connor nodded softly, moving back so Evan could climb under the blankets with him. The shorter one climbed in with him, his hands on his chest. There was a beat of silence before Evan spoke,

"I-I was born a girl. I-I was raised a-as an androgynous k-kid though- my m-mom let me explore who I was from a real young age," He nibbled the toy, "I-I think I was a-around 10 when I came to her, c-crying about how I didn't wanna be a girl anymore a-and that I wanted to be a boy. I d-didn't ever feel like a girl, y'know? I l-Liked my body, b-but I didn't like the thought of it... growing," He nuzzled Connor's neck gently,

"S-So when I hit 11, m-my mom surprised me with a t-trip to a therapist! T-They told me that, yes, I was transgender and that I-I was gonna be put on puberty blockers. Are you following, b-b-babe?" He looked up at Connor, who nodded gently, kissing his forehead as a signal to continue. Evan blushed hard and looked down.

"S-So, I did! I-I started and s-stopped at 14, a-and then started testosterone around a-a week later. I-It was really scary. I-I had to give myself a shot in the thigh every two weeks. S-Still do. B-But, Its been three years, a-almost four, since I started, a-and I'm so happy!" Evan looked like he was gonna cry, smiling wide. Connor smiled softly at him, nuzzling his forehead.

"I'm so happy for you, baby. You make me so proud. I may not know much about this kind of stuff, but I really am proud that you can be yourself." Connor's voice was gentle and full of love, his eyes closed gently. Evan gently kneaded his shirt, nodding.

"Y-Yeah. I-I'm planning to get surgery next month, o-on my birthday."

Connor looked st him, his eyes suddenly open and full of concern. Evan's eyes widened and he panicked, waving his hands fast.

"T-To take away my breasts, I-I'm okay!!!" He smiled wide and patted Connor's chest gently, his eyes closing as he smiled. Heidi's voice was heard from downstairs.

"Boys, the pizza is here! I have to go, Love ya!" There was a bit of shuffling and the sound of the door closing.
The two were alone again, lying in each other's arms.