a little reinvention || tree bros [✔]

Chapter Fifteen

(WARNINGS: SELF HARM (GRAPHIC) AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT . Connor does not know about the restraining order being put in place.)

Mere hours had passed since the incident and Connor was curled up on the couch, nuzzled into a very fluffly blanket that Heidi had bought as a texture stim for him. His eyes were closed as Evan played with his hair. They both relaxed quietly as the tv softly played SU repeats.

Connor looked at Evan as his hand stopped, noticing he had fallen asleep. He looked at the ground again, his eyes watery as the events of today hit him. Larry had slapped him and threatened to murder him in front of the people he considered family and Cynthia defended him. He felt himself start to shake again as he carefully sat up, not wanting to wake his boyfriend. He let the blanket pool at his feet as he shakily walked to the downstairs restroom, closing the door and gripping the counter with white knuckles. He was shaking hard and he already had tears streaking down his cheeks again.

'Weak,' he thought to himself, 'pitiful. How would you be able to take care of Evan if you can't even take care of yourself. You're a burden, Connor.' He nodded in agreement at the thought. He was a burden. That's all he had been. He locked the door as he rummaged through a drawer to find a razor. He quickly found one and broke the head, pulling out a single blade as staring at it, shaking.

"Connor?"

He froze. The voice was far away, still in the living room. Adrenaline raced through Connor's system as he sat down, quickly pulling up his hoodie's sleeve and letting out a breath.

"For Evan," he thought, "for Heidi. For no longer being a burden."

Connor pushed the sharp blade down onto his wrist and hissed. He wasn't expecting it to be as sharp as it was and it cut pretty deep. He breathed out. That's what he needed. He squeezed his eyes shut as he heard gentle knocks on the door. He faintly heard his name being called and the knocks getting louder as he stared at the blade that was currently slashing at his wrists,  blood dripping onto the floor and staining his hands and the tile. He smiled to himself as he saw his vision getting spotty. As a final attempt, he cut down the length of his main arteries on both wrists, watching the blood leak out and drip onto the floor.

"Beautiful, " he hissed through gritted teeth, tears pricking the corners of his eyes.
The last thing he remembered was the door getting kicked in and the horrified scream of Evan.