Poesie

Introvert-ness eng.

Yes I am an introvert.

Im sure everyone has their own unique explanation of why they call themselves an introvert, or how they can relate themselves to an introvert.

According to google, many introverts have learned to cope with constant overstimulation by putting up a wall. This leads people to believe that introverts are cold, or standoffish, but the innate qualities that most introverts share are a love of introspection, a need for solitude, and a slower, more focused communication style.

I call myself an introvert because of various reasons, one includes that I am reserved. I am a picky person when it comes to whom I want to be with, who I can trust and who will respect me as much as I respected them. I talk to people who've acknowledged me, only when they acknowledge me. I don't socialize too much, I talk with people who I know likes things the same as me, not sharing too much, but enough information.

Next is that I actually love my personal space, wearing earphones help me with that while putting on some pretty nice tunes. When I am with myself, I feel sanctuary, I feel like at home (simply comfortable) I felt more safe & relieved. Everytime I am alone with someone, discomfort kicks in then anxiety. Pretty sure disaster is next, I started fidgeting, sweat starts to form, and me thinking of a topic to appear is nerve racking. I have this unwritten note that 'I-must-entertain-them', even though Im not really good at that and I always fail. Really, I prefer being alone than feeling that horrible effect from people.

I hate socializing, that's like the root of all my problems, really. From socializing, there grows all my mental and emotional dysfunctional saplings. The seed scattered, from then on I was always the quiet one on one social group who accepts me for being this weird potato who cant function without having second thoughts on everything. That's why I enjoy time by myself.

But being an introvert doesn't mean that I don't care about other people. In fact I care a lot about the things surrounding me, at times, I overthink if they will like my actions, if they mistook my words or other potential 'youre-kicked-out-from-my-clan' kind of stuff. Simply saying, I care of what some people think of me.

I like observing certain things, for example, a person's habits, or just daily life activities. It helps me in many ways, like a comeback from a really bad pun, it helps me also in getting to know a person. If I can put up with this person, or put them on queue.

Rather than gossiping (this comes first, THEN gossip) I love talking about dreams and aspirations, not just mine but I love giving opinions about theirs. Treasuring someones future career, or their matter about an occupation is a big thing for me, makes me feel at ease. Maybe because I know that he/she wont end up carrying bags of trash later on in life. (Meh) (Also, talking about feelings. But that's a girl thing, ryt?)

K. That's done. Byeeee.