❝ everything is perfect, baby ❞
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affairs, lust and a four year old child never go well together, and when david walliams' skit of being in love with simon cowell unexpectedly snowballs into more, he learns that it's impossible to have perfection la...
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• DAVID •
It was her. I could not believe it.
"You?" I questioned.
Her hair was still the same - tight in a bun - and her make up was cleverly applied but thick.
"Why did you do this to me? To us?" I exclaimed, as she pulled out a lighter and smirked once more.
Simon gripped my arm and pulled me away from her. "You used to work for me." He stated simply.
She brought the lighter towards the photo and erupted into a burst of flames, the black ashes scattering onto the desk.
She stood up, brushing past Simon and grabbing my arm the way she did that day, her claw like nails threatening to pierce the skin, unprotected by my shirt.
"This is all your fault." She whispered in a sinister matter.
"You need to get out." Simon stated, turning towards the door and turning the handle. It was locked. She smirked, holding up the keys, putting them back in her pocket.
"What did we do?" I asked, grabbing onto Simon's hands, as I felt the not-so-familiar feeling, which was once so common before.
She scoffed. My hands started trembling. My eyes held black spots beneath my pupils. I felt my legs weaken. Seriously, God? Why now? "Simon..." I whispered. He looked up at me, realising what was wrong from my expression. Why did my panic attacks always happen at the worse moments?
"What did we do?" I repeated.
She began to speak again. "I was in love with you, David. Everything you did, I was in awe of you. And every time you flirted with him-" She jabbed a finger in Simon's direction. "It tore my soul into shreds."
"So you tore our life apart!" Simon exclaimed.
"And then, David..." she let out another scoff, "got me fired. All I wanted was to spend time with you, and you made me lose my job."
"I-" I probed.
"Shut the f*ck up, you dumbass." She spat.
"Alright. That's enough." Simon said, before letting out the loudest yell of his life. He screamed one word. Help. People bursted through the door, and the woman was immediately pinned to the floor by security. I couldn't believe it was the woman who had grabbed my arm and forced me to stop speaking to Alesha and Amanda that long ago. I didn't even know her name.
••
He tucked Eric into bed and smiled as he perched on the bed. I stood outside the door, my presence unknown to the two Cowells.
"Daddy?" Eric asked. "Yes?" He replied, smiling. "Do you love David now?" He questioned naively. I watched Simon grin softly. "Yeah, Eric. But not as much as I love you." "What do I call David now?" He asked again. "Whatever you want to call him." "I'm gonna call him Daddy David, because if you love him and you're my daddy, that makes him Daddy." My heart swelled with the thought of Alfred, who I had not seen in so long, and the pure cuteness of Eric.
Several hours later, we were spooned in bed and I turned round to face him, my chin inline with his forehead. "Everything is so perfect, baby." I whispered, pressing my lips to his forehead. He smiled, snuggling into me, his body warmth merging with mine.
"I f*cking love you, Walliams." He replied, grinning at me, before pushing me onto my back.
"How much?" I teased.
"This much." He smirked, pushing my wrists to the bed and nipping the skin of my neck.
