The Darkest Of Days

Chapter 7 - Dan

It was two weeks before Dan had been able to find a place cheap enough that he could afford alone. It was small, but he made do. It only had a small kitchen, the tiniest bathroom (reminded him of the London apartment that he and Phil had shared), a small bedroom and a living room.

It had been a week since he had moved in and he still hadn't gotten used to the silence that comes with living alone. He thought every creak might be Phil coming through the living room to knock on the door, but to his disappointment, it never was.

This was a mistake that he couldn't correct. He had already told everyone he had moved and he didn't want to make Phil think he was only toying with him. So Dan had to suffer through.

Dan felt empty. There was no other word to describe it. It was the start of winter. The air was bitter and cold, yet Dan never noticed. He had accidentally sliced his finger trying to cut open a bag and he was completely unbothered. He was an empty shell and he knew it was because he hadn't visited Phil since he left. How could he? It must have killed Phil when he left. He knew he had certainly left his heart there. Dan had never lived alone. The dark of the flat terrified him at night, not that he ever left his bedroom, to begin with. It was becoming unhealthy. Dan could feel himself getting tired really quickly from even the simplest tasks.         

The fans noticed, of course. Dan knew he was worrying them, but he couldn't bring himself to pull himself out of the darkness.

He laid in his bed and stared at the ceiling, something that had become a daily activity. He thought about Phil. 'Did he miss me at all?" Dan knew he must, but something told him that Phil didn't care. "Why would he? I hurt Phil in an unrepairable way. What's done is done. Phil has moved on and so must I."

Dan got up and tried to film the same video he'd been trying to film since he moved. It was a simple enough video; Internet Support Group 10. Every time he tried, he ended up doing his usual shot of vodka per question, but as the questions continued, he ended up going from shots to drinking from the bottle. Usually, he would get through the first three questions and then next thing he knew he would be drunk. Today was no different.

In this drunken state, he stared at hid phone longingly. God, how he missed Phil. 'Maybe I should call him?' He dialled his number.

"Hello?"

Dan almost cried. Phil answered! He actually answered! He was filled with pure love towards his friend.

And then the fear quickly followed. What if he was only going to get mad at him? He couldn't do this.

"Dan? Are you there?"

"Sorry, I called you by missstake." Dan quickly responded, his speech heavily slurred from the amount of alcohol he had in his system.

He quickly hung up as tears started to fill his eyes. He ran to his room and spent the rest of the night, crying on his bed.