Unfazed

Twenty

For the the first time in a long time, I was happy that Monday came. I was ready to get up and moving and get these try outs over with. I woke up to a hardy breakfast of shrimp and grits, which I devoured quickly. Upstairs, I packed my bag filled with: water bottles, trail mix and other healthy snacks, oil absorbing sheets for my skin and a change of clothes and shoes. Now, I am in the mirror trying to find the confidence to follow through.

"You're beautiful," I whispered to myself, letting tears gather on my waterline. I looked at my full breast in the mirror, gazing down to my pudge of a stomach then to my thick thighs and numerous stretch marks.

I walked to my closet getting a lime green Nike windbreaker, with some blue ripped jeans and lime green Nike Forces. After going into my jewelry box, I picked out some diamond hoops to spice it up and hexagon glasses to frame my face.

I grabbed my Adidas duffle bag and headed out the door. I decided not to take my car; the walk to Taylor's house would be good exercise. Inserting my Apple headphones, the intro to Killuminatii's Undercover Pressure pumped into my eardrums. I rapped the lyrics as I was walking down the sidewalk noticing multiple cars passing me by.

I ran my hands through my curly wash n' go before knocking on Taylor's door. "Who is it?!," Her voice called on the other side of the door.

"Who do you think it is," I answered shifting my weight on my other foot. I heard a giggle on the other side of the door before Taylor opened it.

"Wassup, girl! And where's your car?," she asked after giving me a hug.

My mouth twisted up before asking, "Girl, where are your parents? Why you always answer the door like you pay bills?"

"Y'know, my momma a nurse. Every time she gets off of work, she has another shift after another," she replied nudging my shoulder.

I nodded my head, comparing and relating to her mom's busy schedule.

"But I decided to take the bus with you because I don't have any gas money to fill up my car," I explained while Taylor grabbed her bookbag off of the couch.

"You know Foot Locker hiring year 'round. You betta' fill out that application and rack up some money and you gotta buy Julian a new phone. I still can't believe......" She has been rambling on for 30 seconds now and she's already irritating.

"Can you just shut the fuck up! You talk too much," I yelled making her jump.

"I'm just saying that insurance money from your dad ain't going to last forever."

"Don't you think I know that. Plus, I had my own before I even but my hands on the insurance, lil girl," I spat while walking ahead of her.

I heard a shuffling of footsteps noticing that Taylor caught up to me.