{Quoia}
the word skinny makes me sick literally.
A weight of another girl is what they wanna see on me. "I would date her if she was thicker". If they could surgically place the meat they needs to put on my bone they would. Only to balance out the way of society.
The meat on my bones you say I need is nowhere to be found. Only because I cannot keep the weight. I don't know if it's between my high metabolism or the stress I carry that keeps my weight down.
I cry every other time I see the number go down and not up. Starting to eat more, making myself full to the point where I would want to puke. But if I did I knew I wouldn't have that weight .
When I tell people I wanna gain weight all I hear is to eat more and women are dying to be my size. That only makes me feel worse could they would fall into the same disappointment I did.
When my friends look at me they say I'm so long and lanky. People look at me thinking skinny is my disease.
Today as I cry myself to sleep I wish to wake up thicker and not an easy target in this world. I pray that God sees me crying and feels my pain and helps me. Cause Lord I'm so unhappy
