Constraint >>H.S

Chapter 13

Remember to comment the hell out of this book! Vote and share it with others! Love You all so much! X

We both were lying peacefully in his bed quietly. It was lovely to just lie there and listen to each other's hearts beating.

"I like h-holding your hand" he mumbled before holding up his hand and spreading his fingers. I let out a quiet giggle before I grabbed onto his hand and tangled my fingers down his hand.
Harry's lips curled into a smile and his cheeks flushed into a pink colour.

"I like holding yours too..." I whispered before pressing a light kiss to his cheek. He giggled at the feeling of my lips pressed to his cheek and laid his cheek against my head to avoid the ticklish feeling.

"You will stay?....t-tonight?" His voice were pure and literally sounded like music in my ears.
The thought of staying the night at Harry's really made me happy and warm inside but in the other hand I don't know if I would be able to do that.
The scene from when Harry stormed out from his room to wash himself of played inside of my head.
I knew he didn't mean to do or say anything stupid or mean on purpose and that it is just how he works but I still had a fear inside of me that it would happen again and that that time he would actually mean it.

"Um...would your mother accept it?" I asked while moving away some hair from his face and placed it behind his ear.
He furrowed his eyebrows and frowned to himself thinking of what Anne would think.

"I would accept it,if you keep your clothes on" fast both mine and Harry's eyes snapped up towards Harry's door to see Anne standing in the doorway with a grin on her face.

I felt how red my cheeks turned as Anne made eye contact with me. I usually is very good to hold onto a eye contact but there and then,I just couldn't.

"M-mom!" Harry mumbled,embarrassed by what she just commented. Anne just chuckled and gave us both a big warm smile.

"Of course you can stay Alli" As I said before I was a little nervous about it and how it would turn out but after Anne was so welcoming and Harry seemed so excited I just couldn't let him down.

"Thank you" Anne nodded and not so long after stepped out to leave us alone again. When I looked up on Harry I could see how his eyes were focused on the door Anne just half closed.

"It's annoying when someone doesn't close the door right?" I chuckled and sat up looking down on the focused boy. He didn't answer he just looked at it and frowned.
"I can close it if you want me too?"

Now Harry just shook his head and fast got up and walked over to the door and closed it. Right after he close the door his eyes sank down to the floor and a nervous expression took over his face.

"One...two..one two three! one two three four...four five" he mumbled while shutting his eyes hard.
I tiled my head as I watched him do his thing and what he had to do.

"Embarrassing...I'm sorry a-about that" he sighed and ran his hand through his hair before he walked back over to me.
I just shook my head and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

"No Harry it's not embarrassing..." Slowly his head turned and looked at me but not to long before his eyes dropped down on the well cleaned floor.
"Do you,don't feel like you want to hide it from me or anyone" I said shaking my head.

I really wanted Harry to understand that he couldn't help this and that his OCD was absolutely nothing to feel embarrassed or ashamed about.
He was such a pure soul and I don't understand why he was so hard on himself,I don't think I'd never understand that.
It was hurting to see him embarrassed.

"I like to watch when you do what you have to do" I admitted and ran my hand through his soft and clean hair.
A little grin grew onto his face.

"You d-do?" He asked with some nerves playing around in his facial expression.

"Yes I do" I said honestly and met my hand sink down to hold onto his shoulder.
"So please don't feel like you need to hide anything...not from me" He let out a loud frown and shook his head.

"I have been...h-hiding so much from you" he sobbed in and bite his lower lip. I hummed at him and nodded not blaming him at all.

"You can act like yourself around me Harry,okay?" He just let out one more frown like always and a humourless laugh.
"What?..." I asked confused about his choice of expression.

"I don't like myself so why I act like something I don't like?" Something I recognised was how he didn't stutter out his words which made me feel proud but on the other hand the words that he didn't stutter out this time was very sad and serious in my opinion.

"Harry don't say that...Babe you gotta love yourself" babe. Why did I ever say that?

"Babe..." he giggled and bite his lip,making em feel more comfortable and calm about the fact that he didn't freak out.
"But...It's hard to love yourself when the one you really are is a control freak that can't stop thinking of the smallest things"

My heart was actual tearing apart at this point and it was hurting me to hear all these thoughts from Harry which was a very kind guy. Of course I didn't want Harry to feel this type of way and that made me even more concerned bout what he gave even hiding that he hates so so much.

"Does your mom or stepdad know about you feeling like this?" I asked while rubbing my hand in circles over his back.

"No...no and don't tell them,please" of course I thought it was extremely important that Anne and Robin knew but on the other hand I didn't want to disrespect Harry by telling them something he didn't want me to. If he didn't want me to tell them,I wouldn't tell them.

"Promise me one thing then?..." I asked in a very low voice as I laid my chin on his shoulder.
"Act like yourself around me...don't have the feeling that you have to hide it" By nodding he agreed with my suggestion.

"Good" I smiled and pressed a light kiss to his shoulder.

"Now is normally push you away and sprint to the toilet but... I don't know I don't feel that anymore...not around..you" he blushed and looked at me. A wave of some weird type of feelings washed through me and it felt amazing to hear those words.

"Alli you have to...be like prepared. I am normally not this calm"

By this I didn't really understand what Harry meant but only some hours after that conversation things changed into something that I thought I'd never see.